What a strange idea Jesus had: to send out his disciples without money, without shoes, without a pantry, but with a lot of trust in God. And yet it can succeed, even today, as two young Jesuits experienced.
By Susanne Haverkamp
Lukas Kraus and Donatas Kuzmickas were in the first year of their novitiate with the Jesuits in Nuremberg when they were confronted with an experiment. “It’s called the poverty and pilgrimage experiment,” says Lukas Kraus. Even the founder of the order, Saint Ignatius of Loyola, had written it in his rule of the order. “For a month the brothers are to go two by two and trust in God alone.”
And so Lukas Kraus and Donatas Kuzmickas set out – that was in June 2017 – to walk for four weeks. The starting point was the novitiate house in Nuremberg, the destination of the pilgrimage was the Jesuit settlement in Vienna. Around 625 kilometers.
“We’re finally doing something radical”
“When we were preparing, we also thought about this passage in Luke’s Gospel,” says Kraus. “Eat and drink what you’re offered – how might that be?” He himself had just set off without a plan – but with money in his pocket: “I was skeptical whether that would work.” Donatas Kuzmickas remembers all about the anticipation. “I thought: finally we’re going to do something radical,” he says and laughs. “Something where we really need to take trust in God seriously.”
Eating and drinking was the least of the problems. “More likely that we had to overcome the shame of asking for food,” says Kraus. And not knowing when the next one will be. “Sometimes we thought about whether we should still eat this bread or egg or whether it would be better to save it,” says Kuzmickas. “We have always lived in a certain uncertainty.”
It was more difficult to find places to stay. “When we thought: Now is the time to start looking, we went to the church in the next town to pray,” says Kraus. Often they would have met someone there whom they could ask for accommodation. “And sometimes that person has already taken us in.”
Of course there were also cancellations. “I understand that too,” says Kraus, “two young men come out of the forest and ask for a bed, I would have been skeptical about that too.” He was all the more overwhelmed by the “spontaneous trust” that was placed in them . “And from the generosity,” adds Donatas Kuzmickas.
Sharing faith with total strangers
They could not answer this generosity with money. With what then? “We listened,” says Kuzmickas. Because normally they would have had dinner together with their hosts. “And then many told us about themselves, their life stories, and also about their faith. We were surprised by the openness of the people.”
Unlike the disciples whom Jesus sends out in the gospel, the young Jesuits were not on the road as missionaries. “Most of the time we were accommodated by people to whom faith really means something,” says Lukas Kraus. It touched him to share the faith with complete strangers. “We prayed with people we didn’t know half an hour ago,” he says.
A couple of times the two would have stayed in a monastery. “Especially when we needed a day off,” says Donatas Kuzmickas. Because the pilgrimage sometimes took her physically to her limits. “It felt good to be able to rest for a day in a monastery,” he says. And it was also exciting to get to know other monasteries and orders. “The religious were all very nice to us. But my experiences have once again confirmed that I have chosen the right order.”
Traveling as a couple is twice as good
In the Gospel, Jesus sent out the disciples in pairs, and the young Jesuits also went in pairs. Both found it helpful. “You might be able to walk faster alone, but not that far,” says Donatas Kuzmickas. After all, the four weeks were no walk in the park. “Sometimes we were emotionally and physically exhausted.” It felt good when one could support the other, even if there were differences of opinion among themselves. “We did a review of the day before each morning; asked ourselves why something went well or not so well. That was very healing.”
In general, says Lukas Kraus, the sending out for two is “typically Jesuit”. “It’s a tradition in our order,” he says. “Seeing the same situation from two perspectives is a huge advantage for making the right decisions.” And that doesn’t just apply to the poverty and pilgrimage experiment. “In the ideal, Jesuits are not lone fighters,” says Kraus.
An experience for a lifetime
And what did the two take with them from their four-week hike? “The nearness of God,” says Donatas Kuzmickas. “During the hike I could feel: It doesn’t matter whether I’m fine or I’m on the ground – God is with me.” Lukas Kraus thinks that he has become more courageous: “My trust has been strengthened. It’s easier for me now to just take a chance on something I’ve never done before. To dare more, to give wholeheartedly.”
When the two of them now hear this gospel in the service, they are reminded of these experiences again and again. “It has become more concrete,” says Lukas Kraus. “Before that I thought: Well, that was back in the days of Jesus, itinerant preachers and stuff; and besides, you have to see such texts visually. But now I know you can literally live them too.”
At least almost literally. Because the instruction of Jesus “Do not take any shoes with you” was ignored by the two. “Jesus was even more radical, but for us good shoes were extremely important,” says Donatas Kuzmickas. Once when someone wanted to give them money and they couldn’t refuse without being rude, they even bought new insoles for their shoes. “Money isn’t inherently bad,” says Lukas Kraus and laughs. “Money is just a means to do something useful with it, it’s not the goal. You should make a very sober distinction.”
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