The yearning was of an unprecedented nature. For weeks, night after night, they were horny to me. Now I am left orphaned, disappointed in the people who perform the most beautiful job in the world in a darkened room with a shortage of oxygen, probably in nothing more than underwear and sandals: the scenario of Home to write.
The foreplay was woefully long but promising, and could have ended in fireworks of the caliber of Romeo landing, hoarse with serenades, in Juliet’s bed. They screwed us that Tim, the epitome of trust, was a corrupt cop. They insinuated that without Frank Simoneke would not be short of breath. Home started to falter, but now it appears Simonne, the lewd drama queen, is not stepping out of the soap at all.
Throughout the 27th season, the fantastic behind Home once again in the use of drama as a vehicle to touch on social themes. A character called Robrecht – how tough could someone look like a Robrecht? – was gay bashing. Robrecht then discovered that the dean, the love of the mother of the hit-and-run victim, was a dirty, greasy voyeurist. Robrecht died after the dean pushed him down the stairs.
Christine was once again all drama this season, as was Kobe’s acting performance. In between all the tragic events, Tania passed away from a liquid meth overdose, Leo died of a stroke, and at one point Frank was furious with a bread breeder. Instead of releasing books and podcasts, Home better invest in a hallucinogen that allows me to trip as hard as the soap writers when they are at work.
The mammoth web of storylines could have led to a season finale for the history books, but the anticlimax couldn’t have been greater. The double episode was like a concert by Dua Lipa who had decided to give her greatest hits and instead play only obscure demos on a xylophone. Where had the tension gone? Home so typing?
Other than the last five minutes, which showed that five characters are in mortal danger, nothing has happened. Lowie has announced that he wants to be a single father on purpose, rolling out a new storyline, but no one else died, and surely at least one character has to die before the summer break?
Go Dieter and Tim – both best friends forever if best cops forever – survive Chris’s assassination attempt? And does the dated Nederpools disappear from the screen, together with Waldek? If I have to choose, let it be the latter. But first I had to sit on my hunger for another two months.
All episodes of Home can be viewed on VRT NU.
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