Why two men from Main-Spessart went on the offensive

With the actions #ActOut in February 2021 and #OutinChurch in January 2022, two natives of Main-Spessart came out together with many other people from the drama scene and the church: Maximilian Gehrlinger from Mittelsinn and Stephan Schwab from Oberndorf. On March 9, both come to a public discussion event in Marktheidenfeld. In a double interview, they tell how things have been for them since coming out publicly.

Question: Maximilian Gehrlinger, about a year ago you publicly came out with 185 actors in the #ActOut campaign. Why was it clear to you: I’ll take part?

Maximilian Gehrlinger: I thought long and hard about participating. The industry has often advised me to keep my sexuality a secret because it could hurt my career. But I quickly realized that if I didn’t do it now, it would rarely be stupid. We’ll never get together in this crowd again. Never again is individual sexuality so unimportant because the group is so immensely strong. I wanted something to change. And right away. I have rarely experienced discrimination at work. But I often regret not being able to take my partner with me on the red carpet. And in the future I would just like to have the freedom to choose whether I do it or not.

Mr. Schwab, you followed suit this year with #OutInChurch. Why?

Stephan Schwab: #ActOut was actually a reason for us to say: Look here, we’re hiding too. We also hold back with what belongs to our life identity. So #ActOut was a role model for us to do the same.

What encouraged you to take part in the campaign?

Schwab: I wanted to get out of isolation and I could feel in this group: Oh, we are many. At the moment there is a lack of impetus and enthusiasm in large parts of the church, one has the feeling that the end is coming. With #OutinChurch I felt exactly the opposite: liveliness, strength, energy. It was just so much fun to be a part of it.

Mr. Gehrlinger, did your coming out have any impact, for example on the cast of films?

Gehrlinger: For me, as far as I can tell, not. Discrimination in the recruitment process usually takes place very subtly and behind closed doors. The reactions from the industry were incredibly positive.

How sustainable is the action, now after a year?

Gehrlinger: We certainly created something that inspired many. There was also #TeachOut, #PilotsOut and #KickOut. In that sense, it has done a lot. What is only now slowly happening is that German television and public broadcasters are also opening up to queer stories, for example.

Are you taking your partner to the red carpet now?

Gehrlinger: At least my partner and I intend to, yes. Just the thought of it still makes me very nervous.

Mr. Schwab, when did you decide to stop hiding your sexuality?

Schwab: I was a student at a Catholic boarding school. I realized back then that I was more into boys. But the thought was: I have to keep this to myself very well. Today I am convinced that I have rehearsed it well. So good that I could keep it away from myself. It really started when I was a chaplain in Miltenberg. I visited a friend in Munich who told me how he goes jogging with his wife or walks holding hands along the Isar. That’s when it became clear to me: actually, that’s what I want too, but with a man. After that it didn’t work properly.

Why did you decide to become a priest? You knew about the existing sexual morality of the church?

Schwab: When I correctly recognized that I was gay, my course was already set. I was a priest in the church and didn’t see any way for me to get out of here. I then dealt with my situation very carefully, did supervision, later therapy, left church work and worked in the hospital in Trier. I could have lived it up there, but I didn’t. I have returned to church service. For me, it’s about contributing to renewal from within. I don’t know if I’ll do the job until the end of my life. But for now it’s fine. I have a lot of freedom in youth work. I also think that a priest’s sexual orientation is completely unimportant and has nothing to do with whether I am qualified for this profession.

The Bishop of Wrzburg, Franz Jung, once again referred to the principle of abstinence among priests. One might ask: Why is he pointing this out again? Isn’t celibacy for them?

Schwab: That’s right. For the time being, nothing will change for the priests. The question for me, however, is: Why should celibacy be a requirement to live and work well as a priest? Today I also find it overarching: In order to be able to make a certain career choice, a certain way of life is prescribed for me. I don’t find celibacy to promote my professional skills.

Mr. Gehrlinger, when did you get to the point in your life where you realized I had to change something?

Gehrlinger: I knew long before I started drama school that I was interested in men. But I also knew: I’m not allowed to show that if I want to work in this profession. That lasted exactly a week. Then it was clear to me: It has to come out. In 2013 I came out to my family and also to my acting class. I only went public with #ActOut last year.

You grew up in Mittelsinn. In an interview you said “being queer” didn’t exist here?

Gehrlinger: To be honest, I don’t know the queer life in Main-Spessart. I have always experienced homosexuality as a taboo subject. When two men kissed, the response was disgust. I also remember a sentence I said to a gay couple: They may be gay, but they are nice. I had to swallow a lot. But these views also had a background. Until 1994, Section 175 made homosexuality a punishable offense.

Today they live in Würzburg and Berlin. Were there any reactions from Main-Spessart after the two actions?

Schwab: What made me really happy: My kindergarten teacher from Oberndorf contacted me directly and wrote to me that she thinks it’s great and it’s great that I did it. In general, I received a lot of positive feedback, including from home. So I can still be seen in Oberndorf. However, my father still struggles with it.

Gehrlinger: I honestly have to say that apart from my family and my circle of friends, little came. Maybe one or two reactions came from the reason for the meaning. Which may also be due to the fact that not many #ActOut noticed there.

What do you think: is it more difficult to come out in the country?

Schwab: The isolation in the countryside is greater. It definitely takes a lot more courage.

Gehrlinger: Something has also changed. I used to miss the queer role models. The new generation of young people is more open. At my school, for example, “gay” was also a swear word. The teachers have not yet taken any action against it either.

The campaigns are over, has everything been said or is there something else on your list?

Gehrlinger: We want to remain visible, so we have to do educational work. That’s why we’re in Marktheidenfeld on March 9th.

Schwab: I think it’s a great step that Bishop Jung has taken with his declaration of self-commitment. The next goal is that the labor law in the church changes and the church teaching is revised in general.

What did you personally take away from the campaigns?

Schwab: I’ve become bolder and braver through #OutinChurch. Last year there was a blessing campaign with the BR and the people in charge told me in advance what I was allowed to say. I would no longer accept that today.

Gehrlinger: I’ve also gotten braver. Also because I know there are many people who hold and support me. That’s just awesome.

Editor’s note: In this text you will find alternative formulations at the request of the interlocutor. The editorial guidelines on the subject of discrimination-sensitive reporting can be found in the journalistic guidelines.

Event: On Wednesday, March 9th, Maximilian Gehrlinger and Stephan Schwab will report in the church of St. Josef Marktheidenfeld about their commitment to #Actout and #OutinChurch. The organizer is the Pastorale Raum Marktheidenfeld in cooperation with the Forum Soziale Bildung/Benediktushhe eV The 2G rule applies. Registration is not required. The event begins at 7:30 p.m. Information and questions from the municipal officer Isabel Oestreicher, Tel. (093 91) 987 231 or email: [email protected]