Delivered. This short and punchy essay was born from a discussion between Marc Crépon and his editor, just after the revelation of the Matzneff affair, following the publication of the book. The consent, by Vanessa Springora (Grasset, 2020). It was written during the lockdown period linked to the Covid-19 epidemic. And today answers in a disturbing way to the questions that as citizens we can ask ourselves after the publication of a new book deflagrator, The Big Family, by Camille Kouchner (Seuil, 208 pages, 19 euros), in which the lawyer tells how her twin brother was, three decades ago, a victim of sexual abuse by their stepfather, Olivier Duhamel.
The question that drives the philosopher, specialist in non-violent action, author of the remarkable essay Murderous Consent (Cerf, 2012), is not that of the discovery of “These cases”, but that of “The extent of the complacency, not to say the consent and complicity which, for so long, exposed the victims of these acts to the walls of silence”. Clearly, it is about revealing the hypocrisy and blindness, now so conspicuous, of society. And in doing so, to welcome the welcome lowering of the tolerance thresholds for this type of sexual abuse, whether it takes place within religious, youth, sports, cultural institutions or in the secrecy of families, and whatever the social backgrounds.
The humiliation of denial
On the gravity of the consequences of a sexual relationship between an adult and a child or a teenager, and its denial by relatives and society, Marc Crépon puts forward very clear and convincing words: “The predator creates between his prey and him the sharing of a silence that suits one, while he destroys the other (…) [Le silence] puts the former safe from the judgment and disapproval of others, all those who did not know, nor wanted to see and act, in a timely manner. (…) For the victims, silence has a whole new meaning. It makes the bed of this shame, which it will sometimes take them decades to get rid of. ” Humiliation is nestled in denial.
The philosopher also recalls that this relationship which enslaves the sexuality of a child or adolescent “Seriously mortgages its future”, as many testimonies attest. The feeling of dissociation from the rest of the world can feed multiple traumas: confinement, transport phobia, eating or sleeping disorders, self-harm, detesting one’s body, etc.
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