TV, sex and work – Angélique, 46 years old: “I talk almost every day with men on libertinism sites”

Angélique is 46 years old and has been teleworking from home since the first confinement: “I do an office job and my company was clear about the fact that we were no longer very welcome in the premises. They moved and took an office smaller, which means that we no longer have a pre-defined space but rather offices available as in a co-working. This is not a way of working that suits me so I decided to stay at home. But, over the years, I found myself becoming depressed, feeling alone and suffering from not having more interactions with people. My boyfriend goes to work outside every day. And I talk almost every day with men I don’t know. It was teleworking that encouraged me to cheat on him, even if it wasn’t physically.”

Video. “I know very few faithful couples”

At the start, Angélique started exchanging messages with her companion: “It was funny at first. I kept him informed of everything I did, I made him little photo reports on our chat or every time I moved from my desk to make myself a coffee. And then I felt that he was less and less interested. He no longer responded to every message or his response was minimal. I ended up stopping bothering him with That. That’s when I started looking for people to chat with. I had a big forum period when I was younger but I didn’t necessarily want to go back and then I had especially need to talk during the day, not in the evening. That’s when I found myself going to a dating site between adults. First a dating site and then on a libertinism site. The goal is was to pretend I was single and flirt.”

Angélique quickly found what she was looking for: “The men were all very responsive, very motivated. I told some that I was there to exchange messages or photos, but not necessarily for the meeting. And they agreed for that. With others, I have gone as far as making an appointment, but without going so far as to seriously organize things. My goal is to have fun, not to physically deceive my boyfriend. On the other hand, I know that, for him, what I do is already a deception. He has always been very clear about that: for him, exchanges of photos and messages that are a bit stupid are a reason for a breakup. That’s why I hide well. I delete my history and I never communicate with these gentlemen outside of the sites I have chosen. No question of giving my phone number or a personal email.”

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, For Angélique, her time spent chatting with strangers is counted in several hundred hours: “I do my work but I always have a chat window open, I do that during my lunch break, a few minutes here that way when I’ve finished a task. My most important rule is to stop chatting around 6:30 p.m. when my boyfriend comes back from work. But otherwise, I do it almost all the time, as long as there’s has someone available to chat with me. My second rule is to only send photos in which I am not recognizable. I don’t have a tattoo and I never put my face in. Some s ‘complain about it but I decided to stick with it. I’ve been talking with some guys for months. I think they’re like me, they’re looking for someone to spend time with during work days. I I’m not the only one to disconnect in the evening. But it’s strangely more accepted when it’s a man who does it. In all of this, for me, it saved my mental health and it allowed me to have a better confidence in myself. Without that, I think I would have needed help from a doctor.”

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