“Toulouse vs Union Bordeaux-Bègles: A High-Stakes Rivalry Match in Top 14 Rugby”

Sunday evening, the Top 14 offered us a small gift: a match in prime time and unencrypted on C8! In a year 2023 where all eyes are on the XV of France, it is a good thing to highlight a championship which, like Maxime Mermozseems terribly inattentive.

To celebrate the event, our beloved broadcaster has reserved a beautiful poster for us between the Toulouse Stadium et the Union Bègles-Bordeaux, two rival clubs. Here, the term rivalry is still to be put into perspective, since it is above all a club that envies the success of the other, who does not care. In short, that’s pretty much the relationship I have with Thomas Pesquet.

Who says Sunday evening match often says disappointing match and, given the identity of the broadcaster, we could expect some bad surprises, such as a debate on the too many foreigners in the Top 14 hosted by Pascal Praud at half-time. Fortunately, none of that! Because we have witnessed a beautiful rugby match with suspense, trials, violenceand the confirmation of what we’ve all been thinking for some time: rugby is Antoine Dupont’s game, and he allows other people to come and participate only so as not to feel too lonely on weekends.

The movie of the game

This Toulouse – UBB is a prestigious poster, but also a high-stakes poster. A week after their disappointment in the Champions Cup, Toulouse must make this bitter observation: they are not the best club in Europe, and perhaps not even the best club in the world as they naturally thought since their birth. To get revenge, they must therefore absolutely win their 64^e Shield of Brennus, and a victory this Sunday would guarantee them a direct place in the semi-finals. On the Bordeaux side, after a season that has nothing of a vintage, qualification is not yet acquired and we have to go for points.

Enterprising from the kick-off, the Bordelo-Beglais opened the scoring thanks to the boot of Maxime Lucu, the Basque Jason Statham, who was probably licking his chops when he saw that it was raining and that he was going to be able to hit boxkicks during 80 minutes. The Toulousains, they throw a big big “shut up” to Louis Bodin and seem to have nothing to give a damn about the weather. Indeed, they do not attempt two penalties in the ropes of Ramos and prefer to go into touch, and even play by hand a few meters from the line. Obviously, it’s easier when you have in your ranks Emmanuel Meafou, the Australian Predator, the human cheat-code, who like many Emmanuel lately, loves to force through. The Australian colossus scores the first try of the match and Ramos converts, 7-3.

If the match started off on a good footing with rhythm and play despite the weather conditions, we quickly witnessed a first scuffle when Kane Douglas honored his wrestling first name with a WWE mode clearing on Julien Marchand, with a small knee which trails on the figure. We see that we are in the presence of a real second-line intellectual, the guy said to himself “with my Rémy Martin haircut, no one will see me! “. And the worst part is that it’s true, because there will be no call for the video. Again the fault of the Irish production signed by Sammy O’Chaertty, no doubt.

A few seconds later, Douglas shines again, positively this time with a counter in touch. The Berdeglo-Borgeglais took the opportunity to develop a good sequence of play. On the wing, Nans Ducuing nicely shifted Pierre Bochaton, who escaped and found Louis Bielle-Biarrey inside. The young winger that everyone wants to see in the France team (anyway, we want to see all the Top 14 wingers in the France team except Matthis Lebel, the poor person does not like him) finishes the job with his speed.

Double shock: for the first time in 3 years, Ducuing has shown itself other than by doing sketches on Instagram, and the Bordogle-Bardelais take the advantage at the Stadium, 7-10. The only reaction that Toulouse supporters know when they are behind: they whistle, of course.

The Red and Black players also have a little trouble taking this hit, since in the minutes that follow they are struggling to set up their game, in particular because of the area of ​​​​the key, as effective as a prefect when he is acts to ban a demonstration of neo-Nazis. Fortunately, when everything goes wrong, Antoine Dupont remains (it’s probably him who will save us from the Nazis in a few years). Well served by Roumat behind a scrum, the #MeilleurJoueurDuMonde does his #MeilleurJoueurDuMonde stuff.

If he is stopped just before the line, the game bounces back quickly, and Ramos serves Roumat, who will conclude the action he initiated, not without almost breaking his face on his own, which would have been good anyway fun. Note that the former Bergulo-Beldais does not celebrate his test, as a sign of respect, even if we suspect that internally he let out a big fat “CHEH! “.

14-10 for Big Flo & Oli fans, who are pretty well paid after an average first period. The Babtous-Baldequins could be slaughtered. But they know that Antoine Dupont is a bit like an earthquake or a hurricane: in any case, nothing can be done about it, you just have to wait for it to pass and rebuild behind it. So they go back on the attack and, once again Nans Ducuing shines with a pass on foot recovered by Bielle-Biarrey in the 22 meters. Behind, it goes on quickly and Caleb Timu, this Australian who has a secondary character name from Star Wars, will score in force. 14-16, re-whistles of the supporters. To say that from now on, you have to go see the TFC to be entitled to a good-natured atmosphere in the Pink City…

We go blow for blow in this match, and the fans of Philippe Douste-Blazy try to fight back. But the Barbecue-Belugas are doing well, like our friend Kane Douglas who has just stuck a beautiful cartridge at the limit of legality on Baille. Behind, Dupont decides to show that he is very human by swinging a formidable brick. This will be the last time he will level up to our species.

While the UBB (yes it’s good, I’ll stop) thought they could go into the locker room in the lead, Arthur “Ah yes it’s true he plays in Toulouse now” Retière stands out with a very big breakthrough. Behind, it goes on and who makes the difference? Yes, you already know. Served in a corner, Jack Willis resists his brother’s tackle to score. Ramos transforms, and so it goes 21-17 for Toulouse at the break.

An average Toulouse but which floats thanks to a player who plays with the yellow star of Super Mario: maybe it would have been a good idea to leave him in his real position against Leinster, I don’t know…

After a first period rich in spectacle and trials, we clearly drop in pace when we return from the locker room, with a lot of inaccuracies on both sides. Julien Marchand continues his recital in touch and, after Vincent Clerc’s retraining as manager at McDo, he already has a ready-made place at Pizza Hutt. Come on, it happens even to the best goes.

Peato Mauvaka eventually comes on to replace the man who has two huge hams instead of biceps and, on his first ball, the hooker will make the difference. The combination is recited to perfection, three players are fixed and Antoine Fucking Dupont can arise in the meantime. Behind, we wonder why we are still pissed off trying to defend, since everyone knows how it will end. After a good run and a little NFL-style goat jump, Toto rushes into the in-goal and the Rouge et Noir make the break, 28-17.

On his way, #LeMeilleurJoueurDuMonde continues to do what he wants on the field. He says to himself “well, what if I gave Romain a bite to eat? because it is true that until then it was difficult to realize that there was a 10 on the ground on the Toulouse side. Toto lands a small kick to follow, then uses his special telekinesis skill to freeze the ball in the air and drop it into his teammate’s hands. Ntamack is tackled within 22 meters, but UBB makes a mistake. Bielle-Biarrey receives a yellow, and that’s three more points, 31-17.

The end of the match will be a formality for the Toulousans, who will have a little fun: a 50-22 for Ramos, an ass on Jalibert for Ntamack. A few flashes that will not be enough, however, to get a fifth try synonymous with an offensive bonus, since Dupont has left the field and only he can do the job properly.

We will therefore stop there, and Stade Toulousain is officially in the semi-finals of the Top 14.

A week of rest which should do them the greatest good and avoid some annoying inconveniences, such as being hit by Castres Olympique.

Well good evening everyone…

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