Living life is not a field to cross, says popular wisdom. Happiness is when close people nearby help you overcome adversity and difficulties. And this is how the spouses Zinaida and Grigory Gatov became for each other six decades ago. Their family is an example for many. We learned from the heroes of the day what the secret of family happiness and longevity is.
We learned about Zinaida Kuzminichna and Grigory Lazarevich from a call to the editor. A friend of theirs suggested telling about the anniversaries, characterizing the family as worthy and respected. Moreover, a suitable occasion was emerging: in November the Gatovs would celebrate their diamond wedding.
We met with the couple in their cozy home in Gora, where they have lived for the past 27 years. Their sons have built houses for themselves nearby and often visit their parents. The Gatovs have good relationships with their neighbors and others, they have many acquaintances and friends. They have kept in touch with some since their student days.
Acquaintance
Zinaida Kuzminichna is from Pskov. Entering the Leningrad Industrial Pedagogical College, she did not expect that by the will of fate she would end up in Minsk.
“I got three “5”s and one “4” in the exams and was waiting for the call. He came, but the call stated that I had to study in Minsk,” the woman recalls. — The Leningrad technical school replied that an order had been received to send those admitted throughout the USSR. I am the only one who got to Minsk. Of course, I wanted to stay in Leningrad, so I was very upset and consulted with my family. I thought maybe it would be better to pick up the documents and apply next year. Both my mother and sister said that since I passed the exams so well, I need to go study.
In Minsk, she met her future husband, who was a fourth-year student in the pedagogical department of the same technical school.
— There was an interesting moment during the first line. It so happened that I stood in the front row,” recalls Zinaida Kuzminichna. “And the fourth-year students from our department of industrial and civil engineering, looking at the first-year students, as always, say to each other: “Look, Gatov will take this one (pointing at me.”) The guys’ words turned out to be prophetic.
Although the young people clearly knew each other, they only met on April 1. Grigory Gatov was in the hospital, and a friend came to visit him, but not alone.
— On March 23, I felt sick during class, my stomach hurt a lot. They called an ambulance, she took me to the hospital,” Grigory Lazarevich shares the details of their acquaintance. “My friend Tolya came to visit me and handed me a note: “I came with Marina and brought you too.” But I didn’t understand who I brought. I quickly cleaned myself up and shaved. I go out and see Zina and Tolya sitting with Marina. And so it went. I’ve seen her before, but didn’t communicate. There are a lot of girls at the technical school and few guys.
Double date
But there was not much time left for communication. In the summer, Gregory graduated from technical school. He was distributed to the village of Sakovshchina, Volozhin district. Before leaving, the young man proposed marriage to his chosen one.
“We, students, stayed to work part-time at the Luch factory, because the scholarship was small then, only 6 rubles,” Zinaida Kuzminichna continues the story. – We are builders – we can do everything, especially since I had work experience, because… Before that, she graduated from a construction school in Pskov as a painter and finisher. When Grisha proposed, I was somehow immediately confused, I was not ready for this. I already had a ticket in my pocket to Pskov, but he managed to persuade me. We went to see his workplace, and they had already married us there in advance: they called Sakovshchina and said that a young teacher was coming with his wife. We even found housing. Then I went home to Pskov and told my mother that I was getting married. Although she did not see my chosen one, she said: “Once you have decided, then come out.” Mom loved her son-in-law, and he respected her very much.
They decided to have the wedding in Sakovshchina and agreed with the chairman of the village council on November 7th. Friends-students, relatives of the bride from Pskov and the groom (he is from the Pinsk region) gathered.
“We come to the village council, and it is closed: something happened to the chairman with his mother, and she left,” says the owner of the house. – What should we do? The tables are set, the guests have all arrived, what should we do? They began to celebrate the wedding without any decorations. A week later, on November 14, we went to the Frunzensky registry office in Minsk, and they immediately signed us up. Now we don’t know what date to consider as the day of creation of our family. We usually celebrate November 7th.
All roads lead to Borisov
The management of the technical school refused to transfer Zinaida to the correspondence department. She completed all four courses at the hospital, already having a small son in her arms.
— I moved out of the hostel and into an apartment. I lived with my grandmother, practically in the attic, and put the room in order. And the hostess watched my son during the day,” confirms Zinaida Kuzminichna. — I was first in the distribution, because I graduated well and was the only one with a family. I could choose any city in Belarus: Polotsk, Vitebsk, etc. My husband suggested Borisov, because… not far from Minsk. I arrived at construction school No. 62, which was led by a wonderful person, Isaac Fidelgolts. He promised that in two years we would get an apartment, and he kept his word. I arrived in 1966, and in January 1969 we got an apartment on the street. Chapaeva.
The director of the school also offered Grigory Gatov a job as a teacher of technical disciplines, and after entering the history department of BSU, he also became a teacher of history and social studies.
“Then I was appointed deputy director of the school,” says Grigory Lazarevich about his career as a teacher. “Then the city party committee, the propaganda and agitation department, worked with personnel. The third secretary of the city party committee came to one of the meetings at the school, looked at me several times, and after a while they called me to the city committee. They offered to head the school. They gave me a few days to think about it. So I became the director of the old fifth school. Maybe three or four years passed, they called the city committee again and reported that funding had been received for the construction of a new school in the area of the railway station. I was the deputy director of a construction school, and the management decided that I was a great builder. So we had to build school No. 22, and she was approved as director. There were 530 people in the old school, and 1,370 in the new school.
For several years, Grigory Lazarevich headed an educational institution, but then heart problems began, and his wife insisted on leaving his position.
— Once we barely got home. I had to stop at the crossing until my husband’s health improved,” the wife recalls. — He was 46 years old, he was admitted to the hospital. I say: “Dear, directorship is not for you. I have three children and I need my husband to be alive and well. Write a statement.” He obeyed and switched to teaching.
Grigory Lazarevich jokes that there was another reason: a dacha appeared.
The total teaching experience of both spouses is 87 years: Grigory Lazarevich has 48 years, and Zinaida Kuzminichna has 39. She has worked all her life in one place – at a construction school. At first she was a master of industrial training, and from 1984 to 1995 – a senior master. She has the titles “Excellence in Vocational Education of the USSR”, “Excellence in Education of the BSSR”, and has been awarded numerous diplomas and commendations.
The secret of family happiness
The couple have three sons, seven grandchildren (4 girls and 3 boys) and two great-granddaughters. All the sons, as the parents say, are in the public service: the eldest works as the head of an emergency medical service station, the middle one works as a driver at the Inspectorate for Medical Inspectorate in the Borisov region, the youngest, a retired military man, works at OJSC 2566 Radio-Electronic Weapons Repair Plant. On the way from work, they often visit their parents, especially since they live in the same area. This whole big friendly family will gather on November 7 at their parents’ house to celebrate their diamond wedding.
When asked what is the secret of family happiness and longevity, Grigory Lazarevich answers: “In mutual respect and strong love. If a person truly loves, then no cataclysms will interfere with happiness.”
“Life is difficult, anything can happen, but you need to be able to overcome difficulties and move on,” adds Zinaida Kuzminichna. – We must give in to each other. There are disputes and resentments in the family, but, no matter what, you need to respect and appreciate, listen and be sure to take care of your soulmate. And there must be trust. And we are always and everywhere together.
Inga ROMANOVSKAYA, photo by the author
