Giving is one of the valuable human virtues, which means giving and sacrifice, and while giving to others can spread life, hope, love, happiness, and self-respect, everything must have limits and a ceiling. Constant giving throughout life, according to experts, is not beneficial for health, well-being, and relationships. Humanity, it may tempt some weak souls in particular Selfishness By exploitation… Madam discusses in the following context the value of giving and whether it should be without limits, even if the partner is selfish? Selfishness is one of the reasons for the failure of marital or romantic relationships in general.
• The human soul is created for error, sin, greed, and selfishness
Should it be limitless even if the partner is selfish? (Source: pexels by -jack-sparrow)
Human development specialist Dr. says: Saeed Ismail to my lady: Giving is a great human value urged by all religions, morals and values, stating that giving without limits should only be for the sake of the Almighty, and it should be by always providing goodness, benevolence to others, charity and other beautiful values and behaviors that bring hearts closer and devote love between people. As for giving with people, it should be within limits, no matter how generous the person is and no matter how close the other person is to him, whether he is a friend, relative, colleague, or even a spouse and life partner. The human soul is designed to make mistakes, sin, and greed.Selfishness Giving for nothing in return may tempt her to take advantage and deliberately self-cherish herself, causing great sadness and great pain. Hence, caution must be taken from the beginning.
• How do I deal with a selfish partner?
If you discover that your partner is a selfish person who prefers what is best for himself rather than the other, always puts himself in a higher position than others, acts selfishly in most of his behavior, and only thinks about himself, this may cause many problems in married life, but this is not the end of the world and will not be a cause. In life failure if you follow some tips:
1. Work on your happiness first
Communicate your needs lovingly to your partner (Source: pexels by elina-fairytale)
If you’re dealing with a selfish partner, you’ve probably gotten into the habit of deprioritizing yourself and your needs in favor of theirs. Now stop and start determining what you need to be happy, and know that we live one life, and that it is very short, and very precious, and we deserve happiness in it, and then ask yourself these questions and try to find an answer to them:
-How can our love relationship be truly satisfactory?
– What is it like to be seen, hear my voice, and speak?
– How do I achieve the value of trust and respect in a love relationship?
– How much should I give and not feel exploited?
– How do I get a similar bid from my partner?
-Does this amount of giving satisfy me?
Then communicate with your partner, try to involve him in answering these questions, and then try journaling as a way to determine what you want in the relationship.
2. Communicate your needs to your partner
Do not directly enter into an argument to blame his selfishness or self-love. Instead of using the third person pronoun, speak in the I form. Instead of blaming him, try sharing the blame on both of you, or blaming only yourself. Then it will appear that what happened is merely the effect of your partner’s behavior. Hence, you are giving him an example of bearing the consequences of the situation that happened.
It is known that healthy human relationships have room for individuality – but not at the expense of each other. It is important for each party to stand up for themselves and enjoy their individuality outside the relationship, but in the end no one should renounce his mistake and be driven by his selfishness to blame the other.
3. Be a little selfish
Dr. says Saeed Ismail: When the selfish person says no to things that do not serve him, he gives himself the opportunity to say yes to them, as he tries to give priority to the things that please him regardless of their impact on others, and here he must realize that he cannot rely on the “main personality syndrome.” He reduces his partner to secondary characters, but he must be warned that it is okay to give himself center stage, but to be able to share the spotlight with others.
4. Be bold to tell him and even warn him of the importance of change
Argue your partner’s selfishness in an acceptable way (Source: pexels by –keira-burton)
He says: As we advised aboveSelfishness It can be dealt with and is not a reason for the failure of life between spouses, as changing the behavior and personality of any person is possible, and it depends on who actually wants this change. In a relationship where your partner is selfish, hold him responsible for caring enough to change and even remind him of the importance of making an effort.
5. Argue with them, if necessary, in search of your rights
If your partner responds to your feelings with respect, you are on the right track. But if he questions your perception of events and his selfish behavior, argue with him in an acceptable way about what actually happened. If your partner tells you that your feelings are not valid, he is putting the spotlight on you and putting the ball in your court, and you are unlikely to make any progress. But do not despair and return to talking and arguing again and do not Despair until you achieve your goal.
6. Take a break
If your partner is particularly selfish and is not responding well to your attempts to change, it may be helpful to take a temporary break from the relationship. This step is what we call “rescue”, where the atmosphere is charged, everything is cloudy, and the picture is unclear, and then you need to move away a little so that you can adapt to yourself and rearrange things, as you need to stop for a moment for a moment of self-centeredness to practice self-care, and know You don’t need to beat yourself up and show that the mistake is yours. Instead, treat it as a time to set boundaries and show your partner that you will take care of yourself, and you expect him to respect that and do the same.
7. If necessary, stop it
Staying in a relationship with someone who doesn’t prioritize your needs and shows no signs of changing is a sure way to feel disappointed. If your attempts do not find the slightest resonance with him, then it is time to stop completely and inform him that you are about to put the final word in. Of course, this is just a strong threat and a strong warning to let your partner know that his actions have serious consequences.
And more in the field of partner selfishness, you can follow: How do you deal with a selfish partner?