Her partner Jeffrey is the first to inform her about her mental complaints. “I found that quite difficult, because I also had suicidal thoughts. You don’t mention that casually in a conversation. Together with him, I went to the doctor to be prescribed antidepressants on the advice of my parents. The doctor quickly established that I needed urgent help and sent me to the crisis service. After a number of conversations, I received a prescription for the medication the same day.”
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Antidepressants
Vera doesn’t think it’s scary to take the antidepressants. “Actually, I was very excited to start. I was so fed up with not seeing how I was ever going to feel good again. I was really ready to take those antidepressants and feel better.”
Despite the side effects in the first few weeks – a loss of appetite combined with a light-headed feeling – Vera eventually feels better. “It’s very strange, but the change is so gradual that you don’t even realize you’re feeling better. It’s not like you wake up in the morning and think, I feel good. When I came back to the doctor after about six weeks and told them that I felt better, they increased the dose a little more, so that I would really feel completely good.”
Environment
Still, she notices that telling people about antidepressants is very difficult. “And also that I was in the crisis service, especially because that name is so intense. That’s why I told my girlfriends step by step, so that they could get used to the idea that I was not doing well. Also within my family I have always been the first to open up about mental health struggles.”
Now she also shares it with her more than 200,000 followers on Instagram. “It feels like a kind of mission to take mental health out of the taboo, although I still find that exciting. Yet when I post something like this, I see that so many people dare to say publicly that they also take antidepressants, and also tell how it works for them. That moves me. It is so nice to see that they feel comfortable enough to share that with me.”
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Suicidal
It is still super important and necessary to raise the issue of taking medication for your mental health, so that people know that option is there and that it is completely okay. This becomes apparent when we ask Vera what her life would have been like if she hadn’t taken the pills. “Jeez, then I wouldn’t have gone well. I think I would have really made an effort not to be here anymore. My whole life had gone into a downward spiral, if there had been any life at all.”
The medication helps her to be a lot happier, although she also knows that it does not cure her depression. “It remains a process to accept that I am still depressed. There are still days when I can’t seem to drag myself out of bed and do things. It’s not a panacea, but I’m trying to train myself to make the best of it.”
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2023-08-10 15:23:37
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