With a first child growing in her womb, Franco Di Pietro, 28, is one of the pregnant people the project talks about of Voluntary Termination of Pregnancy (IVE) that began to be debated in Congress, since also trans men, intersex and gender-fluid people can both become pregnant and give birth and want to interrupt that process.
The mother of the child who will be born at the end of April is another trans person, Hannah Palacios, from 44 years old, with whom Franco has been in a relationship for a year and three months.
“Our son was naturally gestated, just like any other cisgender couple does. who is looking to have a child without having to resort to assisted fertilization, “Franco said in the talk he had with the agency Telam in the courtyard of the Trans House where Hannah works as a health promoter. “It was a matter of doing all the steps, keeping stress low and looking for the date of highest fertility“he added behind a chinstrap from which his beard protruded.
The only difference with respect to a conventional heterosexual couple was that Franco had to “suspend the hormonal treatment” that he had been doing for about five years “and wait a few months to produce eggs again and menstruate,” he explained.
“Just then my body was prepared, because if it had not been impossible“, he said while stroking her belly that still goes unnoticed.
And although individually they had always had the desire to have children, Franco and Hannah had never imagined starting a family with another trans person, until they met and fell in love.
“Nor did I think that I would have to be the pregnant body, because if it had been with a cisgender woman, there was the possibility of insemination and that she would gestate. But hey, I fell in love with Hannah, it came about, we saw that it was possible and we gave it a go, “said Franco.
Aware of the large number of prejudices that are still active in society and of the scarce receptivity of the health system to dissident corporalities, Hannah and Franco also resolved that they were willing to face all the stares and uncomfortable questions that came.
The gaze of the other and the barriers
“Sometimes I say ‘I’m going to be a mom’ and some people say ‘no, you’re going to be a dad.’ Even within the same environment, when I say ‘he’s my husband and he’s pregnant’ they tell me ‘but don’t you? Did you go trans because you like cisgender men? ‘And then I explain that it does not go through the genitals, but people are still very closed, “said Hannah. The same happens in health centers.
“When we went to the hospital together to get him tested, they asked me if I was pregnant, and I would say ‘not me, him’ and they would stare at me. Also after doing one of the first ultrasounds, the doctor came out and spoke only to me and every so often he said ‘or not, Franco?’ “Hannah said.
Franco he says that “in the waiting rooms there are always all women and me” and his condition as pregnant becomes more evident in quarantine, when the consultations are individual.
“When they say ‘the next one’ and I go alone, you already feel the stares. Some laugh and throw the odd comment, but I try to ignore it and not take it personally. Only once, a cisgender man and woman began to give a talk, they congratulated me and I kept explaining to them. But most of them prefer to remain in the murmur, to judge you with a single look, without speaking, “Franco said.
One of the things that strikes Hannah the most is the name “motherhood.” for the service where deliveries and subsequent recovery are attended, because it reinforces the idea that it is an exclusive space for women.
“For there later it would be good if they change the name, in addition to training health center personnel, “he added.
But not everything was reactivity in the public health system, because they also met an obstetrician willing to learn from his hand.
“She told me from the outset ‘it’s hard for me, because it’s the first case but understand me and little by little we’ll both learn’. I said ‘great’. At first she was treating me as a woman and it was shocking, but now we are Well: for her I am Franco who attends the pregnancy as if she were a woman but she refers to me as a man, so I am comfortable and I just stay with her, “Franco described.
Another thing Hannah and Franco are clear about is that your child will know how he was gestated when he is old enough and that his gender identity is temporary, until you can express your inner experience.
“He came out biologically male and we thought of him a male name, Facundo Gabriel; But if in the future you want to call yourself Macarena or Brenda and put on a dress, we are going to support you, “said Franco, who said that after her pregnancy she received inquiries from” a lot of trans boys from other countries who are with the idea of gestating “.
He has practically no contact with his family, but hers is “very happy” with the pregnancy, especially her 21 nephews.
“I have my 5 year old goddaughter who already knows that he is pregnant“Hannah recounted.
“We wondered how we were going to explain to the boys when they saw my belly, but they already know everything: they come, hug me, caress me, talk all the time about baby, and that they already want to see him and play with him, “said Franco.
“We are happy and (this baby) was the best thing we did because it brought us a lot of light, a lot of love. He’s not with us yet but we’re already loving him and it has already changed our lives, “he concluded.
Telam Agency
According to the criteria of
More information
ALSO
– .
