This year’s first season of it the new “Paradise” concept enters this week into its sixth week, and there is no doubt that this year’s season will continue to surprise with both discussions, quarrels and drama.
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On Tuesday, a new participant will check in at the resort in sunny Mexico, namely Bergen resident Nicholas Suarez Valklev (27). He tells Nettavisen that he is looking forward to finally having a little fun on the TV screen after a long wait.
– I’m really looking forward to it, and am very ready to watch it on TV. Only my boss, mum, dad, and my girlfriend know I was there, but people have probably got a slight idea that I have been there so now it will be good to get started, Valklev says to Nettavisen today.
Will win to have children
Although the new “Paradise” has a different focus than partying and filling, this year’s participants still offer surprises. One of them is Valklev who checks into the hotel with a slightly different goal in mind than the other participants. He has signed up to win and the cash prize of 500,000 kroner he will spend on something very special.
He and his girlfriend of ten years dream of having children, and want to spend the money on just that.
– Now all my friends are starting to have children and you can see what joy it gives and what a blessing it is to be able to continue “their own”. We’ve been thinking about it for quite some time, and I’ve been saying all along that I wanted to do it before I’m 32, so that’s the goal.
But the road to one’s own child is both long and not least expensive. The couple wants to have children through surrogacy, and then there are many expenses that must be covered by the couple as surrogacy is both illegal and a controversial topic in this country.
– Winning will be a huge step towards having children, because it is very expensive. You have to pay an agency, the one that carries the child for you and for the egg, so then you have to have some money, says Valklev.
Surrogate
- Surrogacy means that a woman carries a child who after birth is to be handed over to those who are to be the child’s legal parents.
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The surrogate may be the child’s genetic mother (traditional surrogacy), or she may carry one foster from another woman’s fertilized egg (gestational surrogacy). It is this last form that is most often referred to when talking about surrogacy today.
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Surrogacy is not legal in Norway, in the sense that the Children’s Act states that: “an agreement to give birth to a child for another woman is not binding”. IN the Biotechnology Act it says that “Fertilized eggs can only be inserted into the uterus of the woman who is to be the baby’s mother.”
- The authorities also advise against Norwegians entering into surrogacy agreements abroad, but it is not illegal to do so. Ukraine and the USA have been among the most common countries Norwegians go to.
- Some of the arguments used by opponents of surrogacy are that there is a risk that children may become objects of purchase and sale, and that surrogacy involves a risk to the surrogate and her health. Some also believe that for the sake of the child’s best interests, the principle that the person who gives birth to the child is the child’s mother should not be violated.
- There are no figures on how many Norwegian children were born via surrogacy, but according to Store norske leksikon there are several hundred.
Source: Large Norwegian encyclopedia, NRK, Bufdir, Government
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Valklev says that he follows several couples on social media who take drastic action to afford to have children through surrogacy, and that many sacrifice both one and the other just to be able to cover the expenses.
– I see that people sell their apartments to be able to afford it. If we have to sell the apartment, so be it, but I would rather avoid it.
Unfair that there are no easy alternatives
As mentioned, surrogacy is not legal in Norway. Most recently in 2017, the government agreed that surrogacy should still not be allowed, in addition to what was called an “unethically acceptable act”. Many therefore choose to travel to other countries to have children through surrogacy.
Valklev thinks it is unfair that it is still not an easier opportunity for gay couples to have children of their own in Norway, especially since sperm donation and assisted reproduction are legal.
– It is very stupid and unfair. They make it very difficult for us. Now that gays are allowed to get married in the church, why should we not be able to have children as well? Why should it be so difficult? He asks himself.
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Alternatives that are constantly mentioned are becoming foster parents or adoption, and Valklev says that even though he and his girlfriend have agreed that it is surrogacy they want, adoption is not completely out of the question.
– Adopting is also a very long process and you have to go through a lot to be allowed to adopt. It can quickly take up to three to five years.
– But if surrogacy does not work for us, then of course we want to give a better life to a child who may not be so well. So adoption is not completely out of the picture.
Valklev thinks it is good that lesbian couples and single women get the opportunity to become parents through sperm donation in this country, but thinks as mentioned it is sad that it should be so difficult for men.
– I do not ask that Norwegian women should be surrogate mothers, although of course it would have been a nice thing there and. But I had hoped that an agency could be established in Norway, so you could do the whole process here, as opposed to having to travel around to different countries.
Want the kids to be siblings
For Valklev and his girlfriend, the process is barely underway, even though they have talked about having children for a long time. The 27-year-old says that he and his girlfriend have been discussing their alternatives for some time, but that it is a desire for their own child that is highest and that they therefore landed on surrogacy.
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So far, they have not decided on an agency. They sniff at an agency in Tel Aviv, but nothing is certain. Nor where in the world do they want the child to be carried forward. One thing they do agree on, however, is how many and where they want eggs from.
– We have planned that we want two of us, where one is from him and one is from me, but that the eggs are from the same donor. So then they want the same mother, and be siblings, he says and continues:
– I am also half Chilean, so I want the egg to come from South America and my boyfriend also agreed.
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