:strip_icc()/i.s3.glbimg.com/v1/AUTH_59edd422c0c84a879bd37670ae4f538a/internal_photos/bs/2022/H/L/ik7msxQ5qL6NuwygsYIw/captura-de-tela-2022-03-19-as-14.33.46.png?fit=%2C&ssl=1 "Optimism: 7 Ways to Be More Positive Even in Dark Times | Mental health")
With the arrival of 2022, the veil of the pandemic that has overshadowed the past two years has begun to lift. But just as the world seemed to be returning to a kinder place, the war in ukraine made headlines.
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The bad news, beyond this conflict, is many. How, then, to remain optimistic without necessarily ignoring reality?
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Several studies highlight the benefits of optimism.
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This attitude towards life makes us live longer (between 11% and 15% longer than the least optimistic, according to a study by the Boston School of Medicine), better (the chances of suffering diseases are lower for those who know how to appreciate the side good life), have better relationships and even earn higher salaries.
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But can those who tend to see the glass half empty do anything to change their perspective?
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According to Eric Kim, co-director of research published in the American Journal of Epidemiology in 2016, twin studies “suggest that up to 25% of optimism may be genetic or hereditary, implying that up to 75% is modifiable.”
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In other words, the room for maneuver is great. So, if you want to clear the heavy cloud that hangs over your head, the following recommendations can help you, according to experts.
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1. Acknowledge your problem
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They say that with any problem, the first step is to become aware of it.
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“Many pessimistic people are very attached to the idea that their beliefs that things are going to go wrong are correct and they have the perception that these bad thoughts are permanent, generalized and personalized”, explains to BBC Mundo Allison Funk, PhD in psychology at the American Institute of Cognitive Therapy.
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There’s plenty of room for maneuver to change the way we position ourselves in life, experts say — Photo: Getty Images/BBC
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“That’s why I would say the first step is to develop a little curiosity about this thought pattern and see if we tend to use phrases like ‘this always happens to me, it’s my fault, or I’ll always feel this way’, each time something bad happens.”
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Funk says we should be willing to question this way of thinking and ask ourselves if it could have been circumstances beyond our control that caused something bad to happen to us.
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One exercise that many psychologists recommend is expressing our gratitude for the good things we have.
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“Be aware of the positive things that exist in your life and make you feel more hopeful that there will be positive things in the future,” says Funk.
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She suggests regularly writing “five things we’re grateful for, or texting a friend if you want a higher level of accountability.”
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This simple exercise can help us cultivate a more positive mental attitude.
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Write down everyday things in your life, no matter how small, that you are grateful for — Photo: Getty Images/BBC
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Laura Rojas-Marco, a Spanish psychologist and author of several books on personal development, says that, in addition to having worked on this topic with her patients during the pandemic, she herself practiced it every night after work.
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“At the end of the day, after working 15 hours with people who were suffering a lot, due to my own mental and emotional health, I wrote down in my notebook the positive things that happened that day, to close the day with something positive,” she told BBC World.
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3. Make room for disappointment
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An important aspect of being what they call a “realistic optimist” is recognizing that some bad things are going to happen to you in life.
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It’s not about thinking that every day will be perfect, it’s about knowing that bad things will happen in life too, but that it’s good to “tell ourselves that we will be able to deal with what happens to us, instead of worrying about bad things. that can happen”, says Funk.
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4. Plan exciting activities and take care of yourself
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“It would be great to have a vacation planned in our schedule, but it can also be little things that make us feel fulfilled,” says Funk.
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“Plan a coffee date with a friend you haven’t seen in a long time. Plan outdoors,” suggests the psychologist.
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It is also important to implement beneficial strategies for mood regulation in general. “We know there’s a strong correlation between positive mood and things like getting enough sleep, eating well, avoiding harmful substances and treating physical ailments,” says Funk.
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“Working with your body chemistry helps you have a more optimistic outlook on life.”
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5. Visualize how things might work
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Visualization is a great ally, explains Rojas-Marco. She states, however, that it has to be a realistic visualization.
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“If you visualize something in the future that you want to happen, something that you want and imagine, that will activate your proactive attitude in the brain,” he says.
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“If you visualize something in the future that you want to happen, something that you want and imagine, that will activate your proactive attitude in your brain,” says Rojas-Marco — Photo: Getty Images/BBC
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“Then we’re going to walk in that direction, because it’s easier to start walking towards something that you feel is attainable, than towards something that isn’t”, says the psychologist, adding that this is a technique that is also used often in therapy clinics to treat phobias.
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Funk agrees with the usefulness of visualizations, which should aim to “imagine yourself living according to your own values”.
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“Because when people visualize themselves as their ideal selves, they use it to punish themselves for not meeting those standards,” she explains.
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Visualizations can also help us set goals. And “working towards achievable goals can give us a sense of accomplishment, and that will make us feel more optimistic.”
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6. Discuss with your inner voice
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When you fall into a dark pit where you only see everything going wrong, Martin Seligman, American psychologist and one of the founders of positive psychology, says that the first thing to do is recognize that voice that makes negative comments, argue with it as if it were a person who just wants to make us feel bad.
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“That inner voice is often your fearful self, insecure self, fearful self, or lazy self, and laziness sometimes holds us back as well,” says Rojas-Marco.
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Rojas-Marco says it’s important to establish an internal dialogue with that critical voice and the way we talk to ourselves — Photo: Getty Images/BBC
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That’s why it’s important to establish an internal dialogue with this critical voice and the way we talk to ourselves, he says.
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Argue with that inner voice by offering counterpoints. This dialogue is what “will influence the engine that puts us in action”, so it is essential to discuss and do positive reinforcement.
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7. Recognize what happens in the world that you cannot control
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While there’s a lot we can do for ourselves, the truth is that sometimes it’s hard not to lose optimism about what’s going on in the world – and it’s completely out of our control.
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The environmental crisis, armed conflicts, femicides and many other problems are a source of anguish and hopelessness for many.
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Funk says it’s important to recognize what’s going on in the world. “It’s incredibly human and appropriate to have negative feelings,” says the psychologist.
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But she explains that it’s also important to remember that “we don’t contribute to any situation by feeling drained by what’s happening in the world and choosing to let it impact the way we present ourselves to the world.”
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“Sometimes we feel powerless and uncertain about what will come of a global situation, but the only thing we can control is our own behavior.”
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“If we control our own emotional expressions, the way we treat others and the way we present ourselves to the world according to our values, this is, in my opinion, the best antidote”, concludes Funk.
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Rojas-Marco recognizes that it is a challenge, but says that in moments of great crisis what helps us is to focus on the now and on short-term goals to maintain optimism. “It’s easier to take a step forward than to think about doing a thousand kilometers,” he says.
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Many people went to the border to offer shelter in their homes to Ukrainian refugees (Photo: Getty Images/BBC)
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We must also learn to rescue what is positive from bad situations, such as, for example, in the midst of war in ukrainethe generous gestures of hundreds of people went to the Ukrainian border — some from Spain, who traveled thousands of kilometers, says Rojas-Marco, to offer their own home to refugees who fled their country.
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“That gives hope. And when a person witnesses another person’s generous act, they tend to want to repeat it. That ends up forming a human chain of generosity, of empathy, which is what we’re seeing now.”
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