MGP finalist Oda Gondrosen: – I went constantly and was afraid to die

Oda Gondrosen (25) from Fredrikstad is one of those who will compete in the final of the Melodi Grand Prix on Saturday.

Despite the fact that music has been a big part of her life, it has not always been what she thought she should do.

– Maybe this is not something for me?

When Gondrosen was 16, she participated in Idol, and a couple of years later she was seen in The Voice. After that, it was quiet from the artist.

– The Voice did not go exactly as I wanted. I smoked out before the live broadcasts. I kind of got a little broken. And I thought that maybe this is not something for me anyway, says Gondrosen.

After this, she chose to put the artist’s dream on the shelf, and rather start studying.

– I have always heard that you have to get a proper education you can fall back on. So then it was only natural that I applied for nursing, says Gondrosen.

A lot of time is spent on practice, exams and reading. And the music disappears for the former singing girl from Fredrikstad.

From cancer nurse to health anxiety

After graduating, Gondrosen began working in a cancer ward. She says that despite the fact that she enjoyed her job, the work affected her more than she had thought.

– I thought a lot about the patients and read income notes, where I read their entire medical history. And became very afraid of getting sick himself, says Gondrosen.

Especially in the evenings she lay awake thinking about the diseases. She could lie awake at night and feel her lymph nodes, for fear that she herself had lymphoma.

– I felt my body and walked constantly and was afraid that I would die, she says.

The gondrosis had health anxiety.

– I did not work. It was just eternal chaos in my head all the time. When I was not at work I thought I was sick, and when I was at work I worked with cancer. That was the only thing that was around me, she says.

The MGP finalist says that she felt a lot alone with the anxiety. She tried to hint at colleagues, but perceived that no one else felt the same way.

In the end, she chose to change jobs. In addition, she sought help from a psychologist. She will also encourage others who are in the same situation to do so.

– I thought that I can not sit with this alone. So it helped a lot, she says.

It was still the music that was a lot of the rescue for the girl from Fredrikstad.

The phone that changed everything

After one year in the cancer ward, the MGP finalist had changed jobs to the emergency center. That was when she worked where she got a call from Idol.

– Then I had not sung in four years. I had put it down, and I thought it was a nurse I was going to work with. I was so determined that I would never participate in anything like that again. So I dismissed that phone right away, Gondrosen says.

However, she quickly felt that she had responded a little too quickly.

– There was a small voice inside me that said I had to give it another chance. I think I needed that phone to be reminded that it’s music I play, she says.

Gondrosen then left as a nurse to focus on music again.

– As soon as I said yes to Idol, I got my glow back. And I noticed that I had actually put a part of me away. And when I saw so much suffering and how short life can really be, I had to appreciate it while I still could. Because I’m not sick, says Gondrosen.

Control over one’s own life

After the artist left as a nurse, the health anxiety has been almost completely gone. She says that the music has largely taken the place where the bad thoughts were before.

Now she will compete in the final of the MGP. And her song “Hammer of Thor” is about just that.

– For me, the song is about simply taking control of my own life, something I did when I was in the situation I did in the cancer ward, and did not feel well. Then it was simply a matter of grabbing it and spending your life while you still have the opportunity, Gondrosen concludes.

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