Man Finds Forgiveness and Hope Five Years After Tragic Accident in Ikebukuro

When I see cherry blossoms, which mark the arrival of spring, I feel sadness and tears flow. For Takuya Matsunaga (37), who lost his wife and child in a road accident, the days approaching April 19, the anniversary of her death, are “the hardest of the year.”

However, the fifth anniversary of his death from the car accident in Ikebukuro, Tokyo, will come amid big changes that will lead to the future. This is because the interaction with the attacker, a 92-year-old male prisoner, with whom he had been passing each other, had started shortly before, and it was a step forward this was to prevent it from happening again.

On the 19th, in front of a memorial near the crash site, Matsunaga said firmly, “The level, the stage, has changed. Even if we continue to blame him, the accidents will not go away.” Aiming to increase the number of systems in place so that traffic accidents are less likely to occur, he said, “I want his repentance to become an asset to society, and I want let society as a whole think about how to prevent it from happening. again.” (Digital Editorial Department / Noriyuki Fukuoka)

◆ Suffering from “anniversary response”

It has been five years since I lost my wife Mana (31 years old at the time of the accident) and my eldest daughter Riko (3 years old at the time) in the accident. Every time the anniversary of his death approached, the “anniversary response” attacked Mr. Matsunaga (details explained later in the article).

It was the same on 5th. Mr. Matsunaga saw Sakura on his way home from work and thought, “She’s beautiful.”

At the same time, the images of two people laughing under the cherry tree appeared in my mind.

“I’m going back to the time when I liked to look at cherry blossoms. My sadness is coming back.”

That day, Matsunaga cried alone on the train, burying her face in her backpack.

◆ “I feel a little better” letter.

Bouquets of flowers gathered at a memorial near the crash site ========================================= 19th, Toshima Ward, Tokyo, in Toshima Ward, Tokyo)

However, there were some events this year that made me feel a little more optimistic. On the evening of the next day, the 6th, I received a letter from the prison containing the words of a prisoner.

In March, Matsunaga used the Ministry of Justice’s “Victim Emotional Listening and Communication System” to send questions and thoughts to male inmates throughout the prison. That was the answer.

In the letter, the man responded to Matsunaga’s call, “I want your failure to be an asset to society. and the letter said that he would be happy to meet Mr. Matsunaga.

Matsunaga was concerned, “Is (the detainee) physically fit to talk?” , and on the 6th, he smiled and told reporters, “I feel a little better.”

Since anyone can be either the perpetrator or the victim of a road accident, he says it is important to hear everyone’s views, and he hopes to reduce the number of accidents by saying, “Don’t lose hope for the future.” “I want to continue working with him (the prisoner).”

◆ From conflict to dialogue: The situation has changed in 5 years

Takuya Matsunaga (left) and Yoshinori Uehara are surrounded by reporters during an interview in Toshima Ward, Tokyo on the 19th.

The reason behind Matsunaga being able to communicate with male prisoners is due to changes in her situation over the past five years.

At the criminal trial, Matsunaga wanted the man to face the lives of the two men and his own crime.

For this reason, Matsunaga continued to take a hard stand against men, telling reporters that she would be a demon during the criminal trial.

However, as a result of this, he was worried that the attacker would be criticized more and more by the public and he was against himself. I also believed that if the feeling of questioning individual responsibility became too strong, society as a whole would be less aware of how to prevent accidents from happening again.

In a criminal trial in September 2021, he was sentenced to five years in prison for contravening the Motor Vehicle Driving Penalty Act (possible death and injury). The trial ended in October 2023 with Matsunaga’s victory.

With the court battle with the man over, she believes the situation has finally reached where they can talk “like people” so this doesn’t happen again.

◆ “An Idea for Apologies”

I still feel regret about the loss of Mana and Riko’s lives.

The “anniversary answer” didn’t change even after he got a good answer from the man. On the 18th, the day before she died, she cried while walking 10 minutes from the station to her workplace.

Takuya Matsunaga answering an interview on the 19th in Toshima Ward, Tokyo.

However, Matsunaga said, “To prevent a repetition, your own personal feelings are not the first priority.”

She hopes to meet the man as soon as possible.

On the 19th, near the scene of the crash, Matsunaga told reporters, “I want him to apologize. I think there are seeds and clues in the apology so that it doesn’t happen again.”

The man’s leg problems at the time of the accident were affected by the accident, and whether he was able to adapt to life without relying on a car, etc. to a discussion within the society as a whole I want to make a connection.

“I believe that his words are the result of our efforts. We have not yet learned lessons from the Ikebukuro accident and prevent similar accidents.

Six years after the accident, Mr. Matsunaga is taking on a new challenge to move closer to a society free from traffic accidents.

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◆ What is an “anniversary response”?

Takuya Matsunaga (front) and Yoshinori Uehara lay flowers at a memorial near the crash site on the 19th in Toshima Ward, Tokyo.

According to Chizuru Akada (grief studies), who studies families of traffic accident victims at Kwansei Gakuin University’s Grief and Bereavement Research Center, the “anniversary response” is a phenomenon in which bereaved families dealing with death anniversaries, birthdays, etc. A response that causes depression and other symptoms in response to events such as wedding anniversaries. Seasonal sights such as cherry blossoms or the sound of fireworks can also be a trigger.

It is not uncommon and is a natural reaction that can happen to anyone.

Feelings from when the deceased was still alive come alive, and feelings of depression are recreated. The specific nature of the reaction varies from person to person, and may include “not being able to enjoy anything,” “feeling more guilty,” ‘ and “riot.” There are cases where people close themselves at home because they don’t want to meet anyone, and their daily lives are concerned.

Mana’s father, Yoshinori Uehara (66), who was interviewed by Takuya Matsunaga on the 19th, said, “I want to see Mana and Riko and kiss them. Every year, around this time, I have a hard time falling asleep.’ ‘

In most cases, the condition gradually improves over time and people return to their daily lives, but the time it takes varies from person to person.

Everyone has different ways of dealing with it.

For the individual, it is important to first understand that his current hardship is a natural response called the “anniversary response.” If possible, letting your workplace or other people who support you know about your situation may help them to consider and get help. Deciding on your own rituals for how you celebrate your anniversary each year will give you a sense of security.

People around the person should first listen to what the person wants to do, and then think about what they can do.

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