Pochade: French word that intends to refer to that kind of vaudeville, typically French, that […] intends to take up comically and in a more or less spicy way the intrigues and adventures of eager youngsters and old-timers, gallant misunderstandings and ridiculous setbacks, usually in an environment of small pleasure […].
Gallant misunderstandings and ridiculous mishaps. And it is certainly easy to think of Inter-Milan, a match during which we saw very little of gallant, but on the contrary full of misunderstandings and ridiculous setbacks. For more information consult slow motion and regulations, or more simply resurrect old episodes similar but different for execution. What do you mean? Let me explain. Seventy-third minute: Eriksen serves Lukaku who shoots straight for the door, Donnarumma tries to say no and succeeds. The goalkeeper tries to stop the Belgian beast but in falling the Rossoneri giant rather than grabbing the ball, literally blocks the Nerazzurri giant that lands on him, despite Gigio’s vain attempt to retract his arms. Too late, clash of the titans, Big Rom and the earth. Mariani sure whistles: a penalty for Inter, but the Nerazzurri’s nine on the spot will never go there. Irrati, at the Var, says no. On the touch of Eriksen who serves the potential ball for two by two, Romelu Lukaku is in a more advanced position than the Rossoneri defensive line in which, however, Simon Kjaer dirties a ball that from what football is football effectively puts the Belgian back into play . For everyone, except for Irrati, who unlike that recent Lazio-Inter does not validate Hammurabi’s law. Huh? Yes, that of ‘an eye for an eye a tooth for a tooth’ that we also find in the Bible, but to better convey the idea, the same one used by the gentleman yesterday at the Var during the Olimpico match, when seventeen minutes after the expulsion of Immobile for the slap given to Vidal rightly sanctioned with direct red, Stefano Sensi equally sanctions for a slap on the shoulder of Patric who stages a mother scene worthy of the golden statuette. Do it for a foul, red for red … Corroborated by the decision of the sports judge who inflicts a day of disqualification, one to Immobile, one to Sensi. Administrative Code … Irrati.
However, there is very little to admire, but as we wanted to demonstrate, there are those who admire and even emulate these acts of judgment. And let’s take the stage with the most recent of pochade: the Milan derby, which, to be honest, rhymes more with porchade… A farce that tastes like filth: porchade. Neologism coined in the aftermath of the most ridiculous of the races of the new season and alas we are only in the fourth. We will see some good ones. There are those who speak of a distorted championship in reference to a season full of adhesions and patches, between decimated squads due to infections and races against a tyrant time like never before between World Cup Qualifiers, European U21 Qualifications, Nations League, friendlies .. Who has more and Inter Antonio Conte of players available for the national teams has made thirteen. But this is another very uncomfortable issue on which we overlook. Unfortunately, the same cannot be done after non-expulsion (nb: not even a yellow card) by Franck Kessié: a hammer on Hakimi who does not enjoy the same shrewdness used by Mario Mandzukic during that distant Inter-Juventus that went down in history as the derby of Italy signed and countersigned Orsato who made a filthy confusion between what is right to do and what the protocol Var provided: yellow in Vecino, Var review and yellow turned into red. Vecino out for a dangerous game (sacrosanct red), Inter in ten and even nine after the entry of Santon in place of Icardi. Yes, because Inter has always been here, Beloved only in name and masochistic inside and out. What do you mean?
In the same sense for which, against Milan, Mariani does not seem to be enough to shift the balance. The Nerazzurri give us the right load to lose a sensational match, because let’s face it, after more than twenty-four hours, it is still difficult to understand (let alone digest) how it was possible to lose that derby. An attempt at explanation is given by Aleksander Kolarov and another Danilo D’Ambrosio, complete with an appendix written by Marcelo Brozovic. Danilone, the man with goals and saves as heavy as the points saved over and over again, hero of a derby which – we are convinced – still bears the signs (save with the family jewels on the expiry in Inter-Milan on 17 March 2019), on Saturday he played one of the worst matches since wearing the Nerazzurri shirt, certainly the ugliest in recent years. With Fiorentina he had already shown himself in difficulty, but to save him the goal-save Inter that almost completely canceled the breathless performance. With Milan he does not replicate what he did with the Viola, and a performance that is not worthy of expectations remains well impressed on him. The same can be said of the Croatian in the middle of the field who not only does not shine, but also annoys for the staged attitude that turns the clock back and evokes the image of that Brozovic who is anything but epic before the Spallettian metamorphosis, whose almost farewell on that 30 January 2017 one step away from Sevilla did not move many. Worse than Brozo and D’Ambro only Kolarov who against Milan did nothing but spread the comments on social media, where ‘almost Godin was not so bad’ emerged for the first time. At a good time you would think. The Serbian from his arrival at Inter has not yet recorded as expected, especially because – let’s not forget – he was chosen for the experience he is credited with, and poorly applied in the San Siro match, where he got bluffed like the worst of kids.
A defense that produced more bile than water and that is worrying in view of a season full of pounding commitments. Worrying yes, as right does anyone who has certain goals in mind, but between worrying and condemning Covid is involved. In fact, it is rather difficult to think of a further future unavailability at the same time as Cabinet e Sticks as in this case, how difficult it is to think of a further future blackout at the same time as all the elements that went offside – and only metaphorically – against Milan. Starting from the referee to end with Lukaku, the same Big Rom of the 30 goals in the first season with the Nerazzurri, who wasted more against his cousins than the type of match allowed, in energy, in front of goal, and even in altruism in some cases … Many, too many wastes, like too many errors and smudges, in front of goal, in defense and in midfield that have made the new Count turn up his nose as well who, even if disguised as a domed lamb, with calm tones in public, will hardly shut up once returned to Appiano to analyze what has been done and what has been lost.
Equilibrium. It takes more balance. Conte says it, Handanovic re-proposes it in the post-match, the same ones who continue to believe in the illusion of a mentally healthy Inter, cured of the schizophrenia that has been carrying around since 1908 from DNA. A cure that will not come, with all due respect to Conte. Exactly why the recovery of an increasingly subjective football will come despite the technological aid that, never like this year, seems useless and perverse, almost counterproductive. Nobody seems to notice, nobody seems to care, and then open the dance and let’s go back to dancing. Blindly around love. But there seems to be no room for the elitist poetry of Faber and more than a ballad of blind love it looks like a ballad of the vulgar, witnessing a pochade … with the r.
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