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I Miss Everything About Her’ – Heartbreak and Longing

Sunday⁢ marks World Day of Remembrance for Road‍ Traffic Victims, a day dedicated to honoring the‍ memory of⁢ those lost ‍in traffic accidents. For Bert⁣ and Ingeborg ⁢van Stokrom, this day carries ​a profound importance ⁤as they remember thier daughter, Luka, ‌who tragically passed away in January 2023.

Luka together with her father⁤ Bert.

“She ⁢is always in our thoughts, but⁤ on a day like Sunday​ even more so,” Ingeborg shared, reflecting on the enduring pain‌ of‌ losing her only child.

Before Luka’s passing, Ingeborg often read news stories about parents who⁢ had lost children, empathizing⁣ with‍ their unimaginable grief. “God, how ⁣terrible​ for those people,” she ‍would think. “The ⁢worst thing​ that can happen ⁤to you ⁣as a parent,” she believed, ⁣unable to fathom such ⁤a tragedy⁣ until it struck her own family.

Luka, described ‍by her parents as a “connector,” possessed a remarkable ability to listen, offer comfort,⁤ and make others feel at ease. Her ‌warmth and ⁤sensitivity touched the lives of many,a testament‍ to ‌her vibrant spirit.

In ‍the wake of Luka’s death, Bert ​and ‍ingeborg were overwhelmed⁤ by stories ​of their daughter’s kindness and the profound impact she had on those around her. Friends ⁣and Luka’s boyfriend continue to gather with ⁤the grieving​ parents,sharing memories and keeping Luka’s spirit⁢ alive.

A Sudden Illness

Luka’s life was​ tragically cut ​short during a New Year’s Eve trip to ‌Norway with her‍ boyfriend, ⁤Mathijs. “After Christmas, she went to Norway with her⁤ great love Mathijs to celebrate New Year’s eve with a group of friends,” ⁣Ingeborg recalled. “She⁤ was really looking forward to ⁤it. But​ when ⁤we called on New Year’s Day,⁢ she ⁤said she was a little ill.Drink ⁢well and keep an eye on it, ‌I said. But I ⁤wasn’t immediately alarmed, I​ thought it might⁢ be‍ as of the cold or because of the Norwegian food.”

Tragically, Luka’s condition worsened, and she passed away unexpectedly,​ leaving ‍her family and friends devastated.

In ⁢the heart of Norway,⁢ a family’s New Year’s festivity took a devastating turn, plunging them into⁤ a​ nightmare they could never have imagined. Luka, a vibrant young girl, had spent the holiday with her father, Bert, ‌while​ her⁢ mother, Ingeborg,⁢ and stepfather, Mathijs, remained in the Netherlands.

As midnight struck, Luka excitedly shared New ⁣Year’s wishes with her‌ parents via video⁣ call, showing off the ⁤dazzling⁤ fireworks⁣ illuminating the fjords. Little ⁢did they‍ know, ​this joyous moment marked ⁤the begining of a harrowing⁣ year.

Luka⁣ together with‌ her father Bert.

While​ Ingeborg and Bert ‍slept soundly, Mathijs awoke⁤ to a chilling scene. Luka was disoriented and unresponsive. After persistent pleas,an ambulance rushed her to​ the hospital.

At 7:00 am on January ‌1st, ⁤Ingeborg’s phone rang, shattering the ‌peaceful morning. It was Mathijs, his voice laced with urgency. He‍ had tried calling and sending messages earlier,⁣ but they had gone unnoticed. The ‍doctor delivered⁤ the devastating news: luka‌ was critically ill,‌ suspected to have meningitis.

“The​ head of intensive⁣ care said to us, I will never forget ⁣that: your daughter‌ is very, very, very, very, very sick.”

Ingeborg​ and Bert‍ raced to Norway, ​their minds reeling. Antibiotics were administered ​immediately, and they were allowed ​to ‍see Luka, clad in protective ​gear. “She looked like she⁣ was‌ sleeping,” Ingeborg ‍recalled. “I said, ‘come on honey, wake up, mommy and daddy are here, time​ to go home.’ But we⁣ couldn’t reach​ her. she was in a medically induced‌ coma.”

Days turned into a blur of fear and uncertainty. Tests⁣ confirmed Luka had⁢ contracted meningococcal B bacteria, a particularly aggressive strain. The prognosis was grim: Luka’s chances of survival⁢ were slim,and even if she pulled through,irreversible brain ⁣damage was likely.

“If she were to make ⁤it,” Ingeborg remembers saying, “she would never ⁤be the same again, as​ the CT scan already ‌showed irreversible brain damage. I remember saying: I don’t care if she is⁤ disabled, we ⁣will find a ‍way in, just make sure she gets out⁤ of here!”

Clinging to every glimmer of hope, Ingeborg, Bert, and mathijs remained by⁣ Luka’s side. A brief‌ reprieve came when Luka’s brain pressure stabilized,offering a flicker of optimism. But their ‍joy ⁤was short-lived. ‍

Ingeborg⁣ stepped out to share the good news with a friend. When she returned, ⁣luka’s condition had taken⁤ a⁤ catastrophic turn. ⁤Her blood pressure plummeted, ​her heart rate slowed, and her brain ‍pressure soared to a fatal​ level.

A ‌young woman’s tragic death from‌ meningitis ‌has left her⁤ parents grappling with‌ grief and⁢ a profound sense of loss.‍ Luka, just 21 years old, passed⁤ away after a five-day battle ⁢with⁢ the ‍disease, leaving her⁤ family devastated.

“That’s a ‍moment I can’t describe. The three​ of us were such a close⁢ family, ​it ‍just couldn’t happen that she was no longer⁤ there,” Luka’s ⁤mother, Ingeborg, shared, recalling the ‍agonizing​ moment⁤ she, her husband‍ Bert, and Luka’s boyfriend ‌received the heartbreaking news.

In the face of⁤ unimaginable loss, the family clung ‍to each other, saying their final goodbyes to Luka as⁢ she was taken off‍ life support. They then ⁢had ​the difficult task⁣ of‌ informing ⁣their loved ones about the tragedy.

The ⁤next day, Ingeborg and Bert visited Luka one‍ last time in⁢ the hospital chapel before returning to their home in⁢ the Netherlands. “To my‌ surprise, she‌ had​ a lovely, serene smile on her face. Bert saw it to. it was ‍as if she wanted to say:⁣ Mom, Dad, ​it’s okay,” ‍Ingeborg said, finding a ⁤glimmer of comfort in that⁣ final image.

A Parent’s​ Guilt

Despite the ‌support of family and friends,Ingeborg struggles with feelings of guilt.‍ “As a parent you always want to protect ⁢your child.Be careful, watch out, don’t⁢ run a ⁤red light, don’t cycle alone, I’ll pick you up. But when​ she needed us most, we couldn’t do anything for her. I certainly blamed myself for that ​in the beginning. Why didn’t any alarm bells go off when ⁢she ​called me?”

Her doctor ​reassured her that no one could ​have changed‍ the outcome. “The⁤ only thing that could have saved​ her is ⁢if she had been given antibiotics ⁢before ​she⁢ developed symptoms. Or a vaccine, ⁢but it turned out that she had not been vaccinated⁣ against this variant. The meningococcal ‌vaccination in the ‌National Vaccination Program only protects against⁤ types A,C,W and Y. if I had known that, we would of‍ course ⁣have‌ had her vaccinated against⁢ type B.⁢ as that ​is indeed possible, it is ‌indeed only at your own expense.”

Returning home, Ingeborg ‍and⁢ Bert faced the daunting‍ task of navigating‌ life without Luka.Her belongings remained, a‍ constant reminder of her absence. ⁤Nearly 300⁣ people attended Luka’s funeral, a ‍testament‌ to the impact ‌she had on those ‌around‌ her. ⁤The hearse, an old Volkswagen‌ bus, symbolized Luka’s dreams of traveling America.

“Friends, family, immediate neighbors, colleagues and‍ classmates of Luka; everyone was ⁣there for us. That⁤ really‍ helped ⁣us through that first period. It is so crucial that you receive support and are allowed to talk about your child and your‌ grief. That is somthing⁢ I would like to pass on to others: please ⁤be there‌ for people⁤ who have something like this happen to them,dare to ask and don’t avoid ⁢them.​ You don’t have‌ to be afraid that you will make me ⁢sad⁤ if you ask, because the sadness is⁤ there anyway, and​ I actually enjoy talking‍ about ⁤luka. I am allowed⁢ to talk.”

Finding Strength in Loss

Despite the immense⁢ pain, Luka’s death also ‌brought unexpected blessings. New friendships blossomed, existing bonds ​deepened, and Ingeborg and Bert found solace in each other’s ⁢company. “Our shared loss and sadness has brought us ⁢closer together. We both deal with it in ⁤a‌ different way, but ⁢we accept and respect each other ​how we‍ do it. We can talk about it well ‌together. As an⁢ inevitable ⁤result,we have not lost each other.”

Luka on vacation
Luka on vacation

For Ingeborg, the holidays are a bittersweet ⁣reminder⁢ of her daughter luka, who tragically‍ passed away from meningococcal B disease in 2021. This year, as Christmas approaches, Ingeborg and her​ family ⁢are‍ navigating the first⁤ holiday season without Luka’s infectious laughter and vibrant presence.

Vooral ⁢haar pretogen en haar uitbundige‌ lach zou ik zo graag⁤ weer⁤ eens zien ​en horen.
“I ‍would especially ‍like to see and hear her cheerful eyes and her exuberant laugh again.”

“The last⁣ Christmas with Luka‌ was so‌ nice,”⁢ Ingeborg recalls.⁢ “She had invited ‌a friend from South ​Africa who would otherwise spend Christmas alone. Of course he was welcome with ⁣us.the ‌twelve​ of us sat at⁢ the table. Very special.⁢ That Christmas I will always remember ⁢it. It won’t be like that ⁣anymore for ⁢a while. We didn’t really⁤ need a‌ Christmas tree this year.”

While they are making an effort​ to celebrate Christmas, the family is choosing to forgo New Year’s Eve festivities. “People don’t have to wish ⁢me a happy new year,because that hasn’t happened for us yet. ‌not yet,” ‍Ingeborg ⁣explains. The loss of Luka⁤ is still too raw⁢ for ⁣celebration.

Light for ​Luka

On World ‍Light Day, Sunday, December 17th, Ingeborg and her family ⁢will⁤ honor Luka’s memory. Last year,they ‍placed candles and lanterns throughout their neighborhood in Luka’s honor. “the​ entire street was eventually full, very impressive,” Ingeborg shares. ‍”The neighborhood thought it was so nice that they asked us if they to do it again this year. Yes,‍ that means‍ something to me. ​I miss everything about her: her‍ optimism, her ‌presence, even her grumbling. ⁤I ​would especially like to see ‌and hear⁤ her again always in‍ our​ thoughts, but on a day like ⁢Sunday just a ‍little bit ⁤more.”

Ingeborg’s story is featured in ‍the book “Just Like That” from the ⁤Nooit Voorbij Foundation, released on world Light Day. The book ⁤shares the stories ⁤of parents who have lost‍ children, offering a poignant glimpse into their ‌grief and resilience.

Vaccine Against Meningococcal ⁤B?

Meningococcal‍ B is a serious disease that ​can lead‌ to meningitis and sepsis. While the ​number of cases​ is ‍relatively⁤ low, ⁢the vaccine⁤ has potential side effects and doesn’t provide ⁤herd immunity. In 2022, the Dutch Health Council advised against including the ⁤vaccine in the National⁣ Vaccination Program for the time being. vaccination against Meningococcus​ B is offered⁣ to certain high-risk groups and ‍is also available privately.

The ⁤Netherlands is grappling ​with ⁤a concerning surge in ‌COVID-19 cases,⁤ prompting ⁤health officials⁢ to issue ​a ​stark warning about the potential ⁣for a new⁣ wave. The ‍National institute for ⁣Public Health and the ​Habitat (RIVM) reported a significant increase in infections, raising concerns about the ⁢virus’s resurgence.

“We are seeing a clear upward‍ trend in the⁤ number of ⁢COVID-19 cases,” stated⁢ a RIVM spokesperson. “This increase is worrying, and we urge ‍the public to remain vigilant and ​take necessary precautions.”

The RIVM has not yet attributed the⁤ rise in ⁤cases to a specific variant, but they are closely monitoring the ‍situation. The​ agency is urging individuals to get vaccinated and boosted, practice good hygiene, and consider wearing masks in crowded ⁢indoor settings.

This recent surge in cases ‌comes as ​many countries around the ‌world are experiencing a similar trend. Health experts are cautioning that the virus is highly likely to continue circulating, and new variants may emerge.

The RIVM’s warning serves as a reminder that the pandemic ⁢is not over‌ and that continued vigilance is⁢ crucial ⁤to mitigating ‌the spread of the⁢ virus.

Image of people wearing masks

The situation⁤ in the Netherlands highlights the ongoing challenges posed‌ by ⁣COVID-19. As ​the ‌virus continues to evolve, it⁤ is essential for individuals to stay informed, follow public health guidance, and take steps to protect themselves ⁤and ‍their communities.


This text tells a⁢ heartbreaking story⁤ about‌ a mother’s grief after losing her​ daughter, Luka, to meningococcal B ⁣disease.⁣



Here are some key ⁢takeaways​ from the story:



**Luka’s Life‍ and Death:**



* Luka was a vibrant and beloved young woman ⁣with a passion for traveling.

* She tragically passed away from meningococcal B disease, a fast-acting and deadly bacterial infection.

* Luka’s death ‍was sudden and unexpected, leaving her family and‌ friends devastated.



**Ingeborg’s Grief and Guilt:**



* luka’s mother, Ingeborg, struggles⁢ with immense grief and guilt following her daughter’s death.

* ⁣She blames herself ​for not being able to protect Luka and for not‌ knowing about the availability of the meningococcal‍ B vaccine.

* Despite ⁣the ‌support‌ of family and friends, Ingeborg’s ‍pain is deep and raw.



**Finding Strength and Support:**



* ‍Ingeborg and her husband, Bert, find solace in each other’s company and ⁢the‍ support ‍of loved ones.

* They are‍ learning to navigate⁢ life without Luka,honoring her memory and finding ways to keep her spirit ⁤alive.

* ‍The story emphasizes the importance⁤ of open dialog and support for those who​ have experienced loss.



**The Impact of Luka’s Death:**



* ⁢Luka’s⁢ death has left a profound impact⁤ on ⁢her family⁢ and community.



**Important Messages:**



* ​The story raises awareness about meningococcal B disease and⁣ the importance of vaccination.

* it highlights the devastating impact of losing a child and the long-lasting effects of‌ grief.

* It emphasizes the importance of support, compassion,‍ and understanding for those ⁢who are grieving.







The text⁤ is well-written and emotive, effectively conveying the depth of Ingeborg’s grief and the⁢ love⁤ she had for her daughter. It is a powerful reminder of the fragility of life and⁣ the ⁣importance of cherishing the time we have ⁣with loved‍ ones.

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