Sunday marks World Day of Remembrance for Road Traffic Victims, a day dedicated to honoring the memory of those lost in traffic accidents. For Bert and Ingeborg van Stokrom, this day carries a profound importance as they remember thier daughter, Luka, who tragically passed away in January 2023.
“She is always in our thoughts, but on a day like Sunday even more so,” Ingeborg shared, reflecting on the enduring pain of losing her only child.
Before Luka’s passing, Ingeborg often read news stories about parents who had lost children, empathizing with their unimaginable grief. “God, how terrible for those people,” she would think. “The worst thing that can happen to you as a parent,” she believed, unable to fathom such a tragedy until it struck her own family.
Luka, described by her parents as a “connector,” possessed a remarkable ability to listen, offer comfort, and make others feel at ease. Her warmth and sensitivity touched the lives of many,a testament to her vibrant spirit.
In the wake of Luka’s death, Bert and ingeborg were overwhelmed by stories of their daughter’s kindness and the profound impact she had on those around her. Friends and Luka’s boyfriend continue to gather with the grieving parents,sharing memories and keeping Luka’s spirit alive.
A Sudden Illness
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Luka’s life was tragically cut short during a New Year’s Eve trip to Norway with her boyfriend, Mathijs. “After Christmas, she went to Norway with her great love Mathijs to celebrate New Year’s eve with a group of friends,” Ingeborg recalled. “She was really looking forward to it. But when we called on New Year’s Day, she said she was a little ill.Drink well and keep an eye on it, I said. But I wasn’t immediately alarmed, I thought it might be as of the cold or because of the Norwegian food.”
Tragically, Luka’s condition worsened, and she passed away unexpectedly, leaving her family and friends devastated.
In the heart of Norway, a family’s New Year’s festivity took a devastating turn, plunging them into a nightmare they could never have imagined. Luka, a vibrant young girl, had spent the holiday with her father, Bert, while her mother, Ingeborg, and stepfather, Mathijs, remained in the Netherlands.
As midnight struck, Luka excitedly shared New Year’s wishes with her parents via video call, showing off the dazzling fireworks illuminating the fjords. Little did they know, this joyous moment marked the begining of a harrowing year.
While Ingeborg and Bert slept soundly, Mathijs awoke to a chilling scene. Luka was disoriented and unresponsive. After persistent pleas,an ambulance rushed her to the hospital.
At 7:00 am on January 1st, Ingeborg’s phone rang, shattering the peaceful morning. It was Mathijs, his voice laced with urgency. He had tried calling and sending messages earlier, but they had gone unnoticed. The doctor delivered the devastating news: luka was critically ill, suspected to have meningitis.
“The head of intensive care said to us, I will never forget that: your daughter is very, very, very, very, very sick.”
Ingeborg and Bert raced to Norway, their minds reeling. Antibiotics were administered immediately, and they were allowed to see Luka, clad in protective gear. “She looked like she was sleeping,” Ingeborg recalled. “I said, ‘come on honey, wake up, mommy and daddy are here, time to go home.’ But we couldn’t reach her. she was in a medically induced coma.”
Days turned into a blur of fear and uncertainty. Tests confirmed Luka had contracted meningococcal B bacteria, a particularly aggressive strain. The prognosis was grim: Luka’s chances of survival were slim,and even if she pulled through,irreversible brain damage was likely.
“If she were to make it,” Ingeborg remembers saying, “she would never be the same again, as the CT scan already showed irreversible brain damage. I remember saying: I don’t care if she is disabled, we will find a way in, just make sure she gets out of here!”
Clinging to every glimmer of hope, Ingeborg, Bert, and mathijs remained by Luka’s side. A brief reprieve came when Luka’s brain pressure stabilized,offering a flicker of optimism. But their joy was short-lived.
Ingeborg stepped out to share the good news with a friend. When she returned, luka’s condition had taken a catastrophic turn. Her blood pressure plummeted, her heart rate slowed, and her brain pressure soared to a fatal level.
A young woman’s tragic death from meningitis has left her parents grappling with grief and a profound sense of loss. Luka, just 21 years old, passed away after a five-day battle with the disease, leaving her family devastated.
“That’s a moment I can’t describe. The three of us were such a close family, it just couldn’t happen that she was no longer there,” Luka’s mother, Ingeborg, shared, recalling the agonizing moment she, her husband Bert, and Luka’s boyfriend received the heartbreaking news.
In the face of unimaginable loss, the family clung to each other, saying their final goodbyes to Luka as she was taken off life support. They then had the difficult task of informing their loved ones about the tragedy.
The next day, Ingeborg and Bert visited Luka one last time in the hospital chapel before returning to their home in the Netherlands. “To my surprise, she had a lovely, serene smile on her face. Bert saw it to. it was as if she wanted to say: Mom, Dad, it’s okay,” Ingeborg said, finding a glimmer of comfort in that final image.
A Parent’s Guilt
Despite the support of family and friends,Ingeborg struggles with feelings of guilt. “As a parent you always want to protect your child.Be careful, watch out, don’t run a red light, don’t cycle alone, I’ll pick you up. But when she needed us most, we couldn’t do anything for her. I certainly blamed myself for that in the beginning. Why didn’t any alarm bells go off when she called me?”
Her doctor reassured her that no one could have changed the outcome. “The only thing that could have saved her is if she had been given antibiotics before she developed symptoms. Or a vaccine, but it turned out that she had not been vaccinated against this variant. The meningococcal vaccination in the National Vaccination Program only protects against types A,C,W and Y. if I had known that, we would of course have had her vaccinated against type B. as that is indeed possible, it is indeed only at your own expense.”
Returning home, Ingeborg and Bert faced the daunting task of navigating life without Luka.Her belongings remained, a constant reminder of her absence. Nearly 300 people attended Luka’s funeral, a testament to the impact she had on those around her. The hearse, an old Volkswagen bus, symbolized Luka’s dreams of traveling America.
“Friends, family, immediate neighbors, colleagues and classmates of Luka; everyone was there for us. That really helped us through that first period. It is so crucial that you receive support and are allowed to talk about your child and your grief. That is somthing I would like to pass on to others: please be there for people who have something like this happen to them,dare to ask and don’t avoid them. You don’t have to be afraid that you will make me sad if you ask, because the sadness is there anyway, and I actually enjoy talking about luka. I am allowed to talk.”
Finding Strength in Loss
Despite the immense pain, Luka’s death also brought unexpected blessings. New friendships blossomed, existing bonds deepened, and Ingeborg and Bert found solace in each other’s company. “Our shared loss and sadness has brought us closer together. We both deal with it in a different way, but we accept and respect each other how we do it. We can talk about it well together. As an inevitable result,we have not lost each other.”
For Ingeborg, the holidays are a bittersweet reminder of her daughter luka, who tragically passed away from meningococcal B disease in 2021. This year, as Christmas approaches, Ingeborg and her family are navigating the first holiday season without Luka’s infectious laughter and vibrant presence.
“The last Christmas with Luka was so nice,” Ingeborg recalls. “She had invited a friend from South Africa who would otherwise spend Christmas alone. Of course he was welcome with us.the twelve of us sat at the table. Very special. That Christmas I will always remember it. It won’t be like that anymore for a while. We didn’t really need a Christmas tree this year.”
While they are making an effort to celebrate Christmas, the family is choosing to forgo New Year’s Eve festivities. “People don’t have to wish me a happy new year,because that hasn’t happened for us yet. not yet,” Ingeborg explains. The loss of Luka is still too raw for celebration.
Light for Luka
On World Light Day, Sunday, December 17th, Ingeborg and her family will honor Luka’s memory. Last year,they placed candles and lanterns throughout their neighborhood in Luka’s honor. “the entire street was eventually full, very impressive,” Ingeborg shares. ”The neighborhood thought it was so nice that they asked us if they to do it again this year. Yes, that means something to me. I miss everything about her: her optimism, her presence, even her grumbling. I would especially like to see and hear her again always in our thoughts, but on a day like Sunday just a little bit more.”
Ingeborg’s story is featured in the book “Just Like That” from the Nooit Voorbij Foundation, released on world Light Day. The book shares the stories of parents who have lost children, offering a poignant glimpse into their grief and resilience.
Vaccine Against Meningococcal B?
Meningococcal B is a serious disease that can lead to meningitis and sepsis. While the number of cases is relatively low, the vaccine has potential side effects and doesn’t provide herd immunity. In 2022, the Dutch Health Council advised against including the vaccine in the National Vaccination Program for the time being. vaccination against Meningococcus B is offered to certain high-risk groups and is also available privately.
The Netherlands is grappling with a concerning surge in COVID-19 cases, prompting health officials to issue a stark warning about the potential for a new wave. The National institute for Public Health and the Habitat (RIVM) reported a significant increase in infections, raising concerns about the virus’s resurgence.
“We are seeing a clear upward trend in the number of COVID-19 cases,” stated a RIVM spokesperson. “This increase is worrying, and we urge the public to remain vigilant and take necessary precautions.”
The RIVM has not yet attributed the rise in cases to a specific variant, but they are closely monitoring the situation. The agency is urging individuals to get vaccinated and boosted, practice good hygiene, and consider wearing masks in crowded indoor settings.
This recent surge in cases comes as many countries around the world are experiencing a similar trend. Health experts are cautioning that the virus is highly likely to continue circulating, and new variants may emerge.
The RIVM’s warning serves as a reminder that the pandemic is not over and that continued vigilance is crucial to mitigating the spread of the virus.
The situation in the Netherlands highlights the ongoing challenges posed by COVID-19. As the virus continues to evolve, it is essential for individuals to stay informed, follow public health guidance, and take steps to protect themselves and their communities.
This text tells a heartbreaking story about a mother’s grief after losing her daughter, Luka, to meningococcal B disease.
Here are some key takeaways from the story:
**Luka’s Life and Death:**
* Luka was a vibrant and beloved young woman with a passion for traveling.
* She tragically passed away from meningococcal B disease, a fast-acting and deadly bacterial infection.
* Luka’s death was sudden and unexpected, leaving her family and friends devastated.
**Ingeborg’s Grief and Guilt:**
* luka’s mother, Ingeborg, struggles with immense grief and guilt following her daughter’s death.
* She blames herself for not being able to protect Luka and for not knowing about the availability of the meningococcal B vaccine.
* Despite the support of family and friends, Ingeborg’s pain is deep and raw.
**Finding Strength and Support:**
* Ingeborg and her husband, Bert, find solace in each other’s company and the support of loved ones.
* They are learning to navigate life without Luka,honoring her memory and finding ways to keep her spirit alive.
* The story emphasizes the importance of open dialog and support for those who have experienced loss.
**The Impact of Luka’s Death:**
* Luka’s death has left a profound impact on her family and community.
**Important Messages:**
* The story raises awareness about meningococcal B disease and the importance of vaccination.
* it highlights the devastating impact of losing a child and the long-lasting effects of grief.
* It emphasizes the importance of support, compassion, and understanding for those who are grieving.
The text is well-written and emotive, effectively conveying the depth of Ingeborg’s grief and the love she had for her daughter. It is a powerful reminder of the fragility of life and the importance of cherishing the time we have with loved ones.