Scabies. Isn’t that a disease that used to be prevalent? “Well, not really,” says Areth, “I caught it nicely when I spent the night with a friend. Really, when the doctor said I had scabies, I was ashamed.” Unnecessary, scabies is prevalent in the Netherlands, especially among students it can be intense.
It started with itching, bumps and pimples. “Especially at night I was itchy. My friend was so crazy about my twisting and scratching that he grabbed his pillow and moved to the couch downstairs. I dabbed the areas with wet washcloths, tried not to scratch, but the itch became unbearable.” The next day Areth immediately makes an appointment with her doctor who asked about her eating and drinking behavior. “He also asked if I might be using a different detergent or fabric softener, but that was not the case. When he put the lamp on my arm, he saw what was wrong with me. I had scabies. Scabies? I? He referred me to the Thuisarts website for more information about scabies. I read it at home with a blush of shame on my face.”
Like I’m a pariah
The taboo surrounding scabies is great. “Yes, I associate that with poor hygiene, as if I wouldn’t shower. It’s not something you discuss with everyone.” Still, Areth will soon have to talk to Erica, because after calculating back, she contracted it in her house. “A while ago we had a dinner with the group of friends and then I could spend the night with Erica. She lives in the center and suggested that I sleep with her so that I could drink a few wines. I was able to sleep in Erica’s 23-year-old daughter’s bed. She studies in Leiden and was not there. The next morning I had breakfast and then I drove home at my leisure.”
A burrowing spider. Ieks!
The complaints arose about two or three weeks after the overnight stay with Erica. “I didn’t make the whole link with that weekend, but when my GP said it and I consulted the Thuisarts site, there was no doubt: I have scabies. So I really think it’s because of that night in Erica’s daughter’s bed because when I looked for further information about scabies I read that it is very common among students. And it’s so terribly contagious. The main culprit is the scabies mite, a kind of tiny spider that burrows under your skin. You catch it by cuddling or having sex with someone or walking hand in hand with someone. But also by wearing clothes from someone with scabies or sleeping in the bed of someone with scabies. One plus one equals two, right?”
I was the whole rambam
The doctor gave her tablets to kill the mite and she has to wash everything. “It drives me crazy, all I’m doing is washing clothes and bedding. I can’t imagine my friend getting scabies too. Demolition of the decorative pillows, the blankets, duvet… the whole rambam was me. My friend thinks I should raise it with Erica, that she should know. But I find that so difficult. How do I discuss this without my girlfriend feeling attacked? I’m so afraid she’ll get mad or won’t believe me and start spreading the word that I have scabies. For example, that she throws it in the friends’ group app? I would hate that. My friend says if I don’t tell Erica, he will because it doesn’t seem normal that we are now stuck with scabies.”
The itching is unbearable
Her boyfriend no longer sleeps next to her until all her complaints have disappeared and Areth understands, but feels very rejected because of it. “I’m itching, I’m ashamed and the love of my life is sleeping on the couch. That’s my life right now. I’m really a bit distraught and I’m working up the courage to call Erica. I have until the end of this week, if I have not contacted by then, my friend will call. It makes me so nervous, this is unsustainable.”
What do you recommend Areth? Just call her friend and tell the story or do you understand that she prefers not to say it because she is afraid of her friend’s reaction? Because yes, she suspects it’s because of Erica’s daughter’s bed, but she can’t be sure. What should she do? Have your say in the comments of this article.
Photo by Styves Exantus via Pexels
