Parenting丨Children will not go back to school after a long vacation?The three-part guide to soothing and pre-empting your mood after the holidays will help you get twice the result with half the effort.
Children who have fun during the holidays will inevitably feel reluctant when school starts, and may even not want to go to school! Faced with the situation where children are reluctant to go to school after the holidays, Gloria Zhou, Director of Family Life Education of the Family Life Education Section of the Boys’ and Girls’ Clubs Association of Hong Kong, gave advice to parents. If parents can mentally prepare their children in advance, the effect will be more effective. Can do twice the result with half the effort!
Prepare your children mentally in advance during the holidays
Gloria advises parents to prepare in advance and never start adjusting to school with their children until near the end of the holiday. In terms of arranging programs, parents can gradually reduce the number of activities and shorten the activity time as the holiday days go by, so that children can adapt psychologically. For example, one or two days before the start of school, you should try to avoid arranging a full day of outdoor activities. Instead, you can arrange to rest at home, or conduct half-day activities near home to help your children calm down. If there are more activities during the holidays, parents may also wish to arrange more static activities one or two days before going to school as a transition.
In the one or two days before the start of school, parents can also pack their schoolbags, pencil cases and complete some homework with their children, which will also help their children to prepare mentally.
If there are more activities during the holidays, parents may also wish to arrange more static activities one or two days before going to school as a transition.
Adjust work and rest time
During the long vacation, whether you are traveling or attending a party, it is inevitable that you will go to bed later than usual. Parents should gradually adjust their children’s bedtime earlier two to three days before the holiday ends. Gloria suggests that parents can let their children go to bed half an hour earlier every day to adjust their biological clock. Otherwise, when the school day comes, the children will feel uncomfortable and reluctant.
During the long vacation, whether you are traveling or attending a party, it is inevitable that you will go to bed later than usual.
Sudden changes are taboo
Gloria emphasized that the arrangement of activities, psychological adjustment or preparation for school should also be arranged in advance to facilitate children’s gradual adaptation. Never wait until the last day to remind your children that they have to go to school tomorrow. Only when children have sufficient time to prepare emotionally and psychologically can the chance of children resisting going to school be reduced. Even though the vacation lasts only about a week, children have become accustomed to going out and having fun every day, and suddenly they have to go back to school to face academic pressure. The change is not easy for people to accept.
A trilogy of emotional counseling to soothe your mind after the holidays
When children are upset on the first day of school and do not want to go to school, parents may wish to refer to the trilogy of emotional counseling provided by Gloria to calm their children’s emotions and prepare for the school day.
If a child does not want to go to school, parents should avoid communicating with the child in a blaming manner.
1. Let children express their emotions and feelings
Parents should first wake up their children in advance. If their children do not want to go to school, parents should avoid communicating with their children in a blaming manner, such as saying, “I told you to go to bed early this morning!” to blame the child. When a child “screams” or becomes angry, parents should ask the child to express his or her emotions. For example, ask the child “Are you unhappy or angry?” or “Don’t you want to go to school?” and invite the child to share more about his or her status. Let your emotions out.
2. Empathize and let children know that their parents understand their feelings.
When the child gradually regains his composure, parents can respond to the child with empathy: “Mom, I understand that you are very happy during the holiday and want to continue playing with your friends.” Let the child know that parents actually understand their mentality and reasons for not wanting to go to school. , respond to the child’s emotional needs.
3. Set boundaries for children’s behavior
When parents show that they understand their children’s feelings, they can begin to set boundaries for their children’s behavior. While setting norms, parents can also give their children some choices: “I understand how you feel, but we do have to go to school. Why don’t we do your favorite activities or continue to rest after school today!”, “After school. Let’s pack up the belongings from the previous trip together!” But you must clearly let your children know that the vacation is coming to an end and they cannot miss school.
Gloria reminds parents that the arrangement of activities, psychological adjustment or preparation for school should be arranged in advance to facilitate their children’s gradual adaptation. When children are in a mood, parents should not immediately blame them, but respond patiently with emotional counseling, so that children can more easily adapt to campus life.
Chow Xuet-wei, Family Life Education Director of the Family Life Education Section of the Boys’ and Girls’ Clubs Association of Hong Kong
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2024-01-03 05:41:28
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