American and Norwegian researchers have jointly studied the most effective flirting techniques. They differ between men and women.
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There are many ways to flirt, whether it’s for a casual or serious relationship. But what techniques work best for making it happen in a heterosexual relationship? American and Norwegian scientists tried to answer this question, thanks to questionnaires – not experiments – answered by 415 men and women in Norway and 577 in the United States.
What is flirting? According to Professor Kennair, who belongs to the research group, “flirting involves different signals that people send to each other. It is done to attract potential partners. Both men and women flirt to get a partner’s attention. desired, and perhaps to derive a sexual or romantic result from it”. This can be verbal or not.
Humor, essential criterion
Humor ranks high on the podium for both long-term and short-term relationships. For both men and women, laughing at the coveted person’s jokes is considered “beneficial”. But cracking jokes is a much more useful strategy for men, especially those who want a serious story. “For women, it’s not only effective to be funny. It’s very important that they also show their potential partner that they find him funny,” explains psychologist Rebecca Burch, from Norwegian SciTech News.
For women, on the other hand, the chances of success lie elsewhere: “People consider that the signals indicating that you are sexually available are the most effective for women who are looking for a short-term relationship”, continues Professor Kennair. Concretely, the most effective flirts would be those who make obvious sexual advances, which pass “by physical contact” or even “sexy clothes”, according to the results. Also, when a woman is looking for a short relationship, a friendly touch (kiss on the cheek, hug) will not work.
Among men, those who manage to highlight their personality traits have a better chance of achieving their goals. For those who are looking for a long-term romantic relationship, “signs of generosity and the willingness to commit work best”: for example an “intimate conversation”, or even “spending time together “, are recommended by the study.
Why such a difference in flirting according to gender?
Even when it comes to flirting, gender inequality remains persistent. According to many scientific studies conducted on this subject, this difference lies because of the pressures of sexual selection in the human species. For males, sex comes with minimal obligations or investments with offspring. So, according to the theory of evolution, they are more likely to have multiple partners. Women, on the other hand, need to be more picky and selective.
Although fundamentally different, the American and Norwegian cultures, however, achieve similar results on the most effective flirting techniques. “It seems that flirting is largely the same in the United States and in Norway,” reacts Professor Kennair. In both cultures, body language, first contact and degree of generosity are valued.
“This indicates that flirting considered ‘effective’ is largely universal. This is not surprising, since the motivations for finding a partner are partly biological”, details one of the researchers.
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