Even though according to research at this age the level of happiness has decreased, we can still be happy at the age of 40, really. The important thing is realistic
According to study, most humans experience a decrease in their level of happiness in middle age (then I was stunned, aish, apparently I have reached mid-life age apparently. Brb looking for collagen pools). What about mommies who are on par with me? Justify experiencing a decrease in the level of happiness?
Well, according to Andrea Brandt Ph.D. M.F.T. a person licensed psychotherapist from the United States, at the age of 4o and above, this becomes normal. Even though at this age most people have stable lives, have good careers, are married, and have homes, there are things that are not so good too.
For example, dI aged 40 years and over generally experience a decline in health, especially for those who have an unhealthy lifestyle. It could also be that he has experienced career setbacks, has children who are ‘troublesome’, divorced, and stressed.
Then how do we keep things like that from affecting our level of happiness? Remember, we, really, have reached the age of wisdom, you know. Aseg! The following tips might be considered so that life goes on pleasantly (or at least calmly) even though the age of 50 is approaching.
Choose a relationship that is meaningful and makes you happy
“As they get older and the time horizon shortens, people prefer to invest in things that they think are more important, in this case usually meaningful relationships, and derive greater satisfaction from these investments,” said the psychologist. Laura Carstensen from Stanford University.
Emotional experiences increase with age. That’s why a person will appreciate more and invest more effort that brings emotional happiness.
To be happier, spend time with friends that mommies think are close. Try not to cancel scheduled get-togethers, especially since these schedules are rarely done due to busyness. It’s okay with the closest family. If you are a single mom, you may also open up but choose a healthy relationship. At this age, it’s not the time to look for a ‘drama’ partner.
Don’t forget, spend more time doing hobbies. Invest time and energy in the things that are most important and unrelated to your day-to-day ambitions of career advancement.
Also read: 7 Forms of Violence Against Children That Parents Rarely Aware of
Abandon unrealistic expectations
By accepting our own strengths and weaknesses, there are times when we have to let go of “impossible aspirations”. For example, ambition when I was still young, 25 years old. Don’t forget what makes mommies happy right now. For example, mommies want, at least before they die to have their own book written and sold in big bookstores. But this is not likely to be done in the near future, given the busyness, or maybe the fact that mommies can’t write.
Instead of beating yourself up about what you think you will achieve at this age, just focus on what you have achieved. Focus on the joy and happiness you have in life right now, and what you can still do. It’s also okay to set new ambitions that are ‘realistic’ to do at this middle age.
Live for the moment
When the future feels less distant, more limited, it’s good for one to focus on the present. According to Carstensen it is better to add to the emotional experience.
Our goals change too, as we age. “The goals that are activated in midlife are generally about meaning and enjoying and living in the moment.”
Setting your own life goals can be more realistic and easier to pursue. No need for grandiose. To be happier, we don’t need to pinpoint what happiness looks like. Enjoy what we have for now. Live for the moment.
