Initially having intense sex, but “haven’t gone to the market yet”
Two years ago, Ms. Huong Linh (36 years old, Ho Chi Minh City) met a foreign boyfriend over 10 years old, divorced, working as a software engineer on social networks. She said that her boyfriend is a good person, has a high-paying job, and the two of them get along with everything, but there is a problem with sex.
“During the course of love, we met four times. Every time he meets, he is intense and has a lot of sex. Although every time he has sex, he “has not gone to the market yet” but I am satisfied, partly I do not think much and do not care”, Huong Linh shared.
Work pressure also causes many people to reduce their sex drive. Illustration.
Loving each other for 2 years, accepted by the two families, they decided to have a wedding, he went to Vietnam to take her to take wedding photos, prepare for the wedding party at a beach in Vung Tau. They intend, after the wedding, she will move to his country to settle down and have children right away because both are old.
When there was only a week left until the wedding reception, he confessed: “I am very worried about sex. I’m afraid that after marriage, I won’t be able to make you feel. Right now he is very stressed because of work. He also had a lot of things to worry about so he didn’t feel it. After getting married, can we sleep together without sex? If you don’t accept it, it’s still not too late to think again.”
He also confessed that he had lived with his previous wife for more than three years and had no children. Previously, his wife asked for a divorce because he could not fulfill his husband’s responsibilities.
Ms. Huong Linh said that at first, she felt sad and disappointed because there was only one week left until the wedding day, the party was ready, and the invitations were all sent out. When she calmed down, she remembered the recent time when the two of them slept together, even though she took the initiative to kiss and stimulate him, he still didn’t feel it.
At that time, he admitted that the work he was doing had a lot of pressure that made him always tired and stressed, and when he came home, he just wanted to rest. About to enter a marriage relationship with her makes him more afraid and pressured.
“He is a good man who always loves, worries and takes care of me, if I break up with him because of that, I can’t do it,” Huong Linh shared.
Near the wedding day, Huong Linh was advised by her boyfriend to leave. Illustration.
When persuaded by his girlfriend, he and his sister went to a male doctor and was diagnosed with a decreased sex drive. Doctors advised him to reduce the pressure at work to balance his life.
You should also limit stimulants, stay up at night, eat enough, exercise regularly to enhance physical strength. In addition, you should also regularly “change the wind” to have a more normal sex life.
Work pressure is the cause of low sex drive
According to Dr. BS Nguyen Dinh Lien, Head of Department of Urology – Andrology, E Hospital (Hanoi), sexual desire is determined by the male hormone testosterone (male sex hormone). With age, testosterone levels decrease.
Many studies show that after the age of 30, hormones decrease by 1-2% per year. In middle age, testosterone levels decline more sharply, only about 40-60% of the peak. Because of this, men who enter the age of 40 like the above husband are prone to physiological decline. When the sex life is in trouble, it is possible to fall into the situation of “upper and lower not listening” or “have not gone to the market and have run out of money”. This situation is worse for people with diabetes, dyslipidemia, etc.
Bed problems can affect marital happiness. Illustration.
According to Dr. Lien, being too tired at work is also a factor affecting sex in both men and women. “When I’m tired, my spouse “suggests” that I ignore it is a normal response to protect the body’s health, or it’s because I’m too sleepy,” said Doctor Lien.
Dr. Lien has met patients who are too tired to fall in love, because they do not share with their spouse or try to endure without going to the doctor, leading to many problems in married life. To overcome the decrease in libido, Dr. Lien recommends:
+ Need to share with your spouse and go to the doctor to find out the cause soon to have the best remedy.
+ It is necessary to have a healthy lifestyle, eat scientifically, limit alcohol, quit smoking and exercise regularly.
+ Together with your spouse and partner, learn the secrets to regaining sexual feelings to equip yourself with sexual knowledge.
+ Spouses also need to have sharing and understanding to make sex more romantic.
+ Warm up emotions by choosing a new space, changing positions, and avoiding inhibited sex as much as possible.
* Character names in the post have been changed
After her first daughter was 2 years old, Huong Oanh was found to have cervical cancer, turning her life completely upside down.
Women’s disease
