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Fanny (38) is the mother of Claar (7) and Dirk (5). She has a long relationship with Jarno (43), father of Britt (8) and she wonders if communication with her ex is normal.
Stay: “This was our first holiday together. We thought it was exciting, especially our exes. We already knew that our children would get on well together, but what that would be like if we were close to each other for two weeks was a test.
My ex-husband was particularly worried about the latter: the first time he mixed school children with Claar and Dirk it was not successful. Jarno’s ex-wife was particularly worried about me, ‘the other woman’ who ran away with her child for two weeks – in her eyes. Not all big issues, Jarno and I thought, are easy to manage. In good spirits we went to Italy in a rented bus.
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As if she were there
It was a huge success. The children were nowhere to be seen during the entire holiday. While they were playing with each other and camping friends, Jarno and I devoured one book after another, and even had time for old-fashioned sex in the daylight.
A dream vacation, you might say, except for one worry: his ex. When Jarno had a chance, he was on his phone. Often protected from me, and from his face I could tell he was texting her. Very well indeed – especially since her daughter was with us. I just thought the frequency of their app communication was a bit off. Sometimes it almost seemed like she was there in person, or that he preferred her that way.
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Not jealous
“How often do you text her?” I quickly asked him halfway through the vacation. Five times a day, he replied. ‘Three times a day a picture, and then two standard messages.’ My jaw dropped. I had also sent a few messages to the father of my children, but at most every two days, with just a short update on how Claar and Dirk were doing. There wasn’t much else to say about that, just like about Britt; it just ran smoothly.
In order not to spoil the mood, I decided to drop the subject, but it really bothered me. Although I didn’t feel jealous, that feeling was definitely there. I really wanted to be away from home with him and our children for a while. That didn’t work at all because of his endless texting.
‘During a make out session in the dunes we suddenly heard footsteps’
Overprotective
We have been home for a week now, and we are both busy with our own lives again, in separate houses. But the subject still bothers me. Jarno has been divorced for three years, and although he doesn’t have as much contact with his ex on the weekends when we are together at home as he does on holidays, it too every day here. As far as I know it’s always about their daughter, but does he really need to talk to her every day? I think he is very overprotective. My ex and I only talk about the things that are necessary, such as events at school, the flu or changes in the transition period. I feel like I’m in a kind of love triangle. Am I exaggerating, or should the relationship between my boyfriend and my ex be less? “
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2024-08-18 19:06:46
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