“Dad, we know that YOU are writing to us!” – Thorsten Wallnig, an adult education center teacher from Berlin, often hears this sentence from his children. The 56-year-old likes to say goodbye in chat messages with “Greetings, your dad,” which is rather unusual in the fast-moving world of messengers. For Wallnig, however, this is part of polite interaction – even if chat programs are often used for casual, short communication. “Everyone is allowed to keep their own idiosyncrasies,” says the teacher.
Wallnig’s case shows that how we communicate in the digital age depends heavily on age. This is also confirmed by communication scientist Tobias Dienlin from the University of Vienna. It’s all about learned habits, which differ depending on the generation. Chat programs, which originally emerged as communication platforms for young people, are designed for quick and practical conversations – formal correctness is not the focus.
Older people, on the other hand, are more likely to transfer their usual patterns of letter or telephone communication into the digital world.
On WhatsApp and SMS without greetings
The way different age groups communicate with each other has changed dramatically in the digital age. Younger people who grew up with cell phones and the Internet often see their chat histories as “ongoing communication” in which there is no need to explicitly start or end conversations. They are constantly connected and share their thoughts and experiences in real time.
Adult education teacher Thorsten Wallnig: Digital style often depends on age.Jörg Carstensen/dpa
Emojis are often viewed as a deficient form of communication
Older people, especially those who developed their communication patterns before the digital boom, often see messenger conversations as “islands of communication” – similar to a phone call or a letter.
These different approaches are also reflected in the use of punctuation, capitalization and the use of emojis. The communication scientist Tobias Dienlin points out that the perception that the younger generation expresses itself “worsely” than the older generation has existed since ancient times. “The fact that young people are worse than the previous generation has been true since the time of Socrates,” jokes Dienlin.
Emojis, which did not exist in classical written language, are often viewed as a deficient form of communication. But they offer a way to convey feelings and moods in text messages that would be difficult to convey through words alone.
Peach or eggplant emoji usually in a sexual context
Emojis are another example of the differences in digital communication between young and old. While the small images are ubiquitous among younger people, older people use them less often. But emojis also represent a kind of culture – the correct use has to be learned. Who would have thought that a peach or an eggplant emoji would mostly be used in sexual contexts?
According to the YouGov survey, only a small minority of four percent of all age groups do not use emojis at all. However, 43 percent of 25 to 34-year-olds say they “almost always” use emojis – compared to just 18 percent of those over 55.
Despite the differences in emoji usage, the need for customization is high when speaking to other generations. More than half of those surveyed (54 percent) say they adapt the way they communicate when dealing with other age groups. This is particularly pronounced among younger people: 83 percent of 18 to 24 year olds and around three quarters of 25 to 34 year olds adapt their chatting habits when they talk to older people. In contrast, the figure for the 55+ generation is only 36 percent.
Children appreciate it when parents and grandparents use text messages.Zacharie Scheurer/dpa
Digital bridges between generations
Although there are clear differences in the way different generations chat, Thorsten Wallnig’s experience shows that digital interaction can also be exciting and enriching for older people. Wallnig, who has been a teacher at the adult education center for over 30 years, has been teaching courses on “WhatsApp and Co” to seniors over the age of 80 for twelve years. For his students, chatting with grandchildren and children is a valuable way to stay in touch.
“They really enjoy it because they can communicate more extensively with their families,” reports Wallnig. Many of his students have long since learned to forego typical messenger etiquette and often leave out greetings. There are no tensions between the generations – on the contrary: “The grandchildren are usually really happy when grandma or grandpa suddenly use WhatsApp. They think that’s really cool – at least until the cat videos come,” laughs Wallnig.
Tobias Dienlin from the University of Vienna also emphasizes that the need for a relationship stands above all else. Messenger apps enable people of all ages to get in touch with one another in an uncomplicated and low-threshold manner. And while there are big differences in the way chatting occurs, the essence remains the same: the desire to stay connected. ■
