Debby (33) has metastatic breast cancer: ‘One phone call changed my life instantly’

On June 20, 2024, Debby van Rijn receives a phone call that causes the earth to disappear beneath her. At the time, she is alone at home with her youngest son, who is less than one year old, and her eldest son, who is four years old. It’s the hospital, the results are there: ‘We don’t have good news for you. Yes, you have breast cancer and it has spread. You can no longer be cured.’

In March she called the doctor. Her son had accidentally kicked his chest, resulting in a painful lump. “According to the doctor, I shouldn’t look into it too much, after all, I had just given birth four months before and the bump could be due to the changes all hormones.” The doctor sends Debby home with the message to keep an eye on him.

If the lump doesn’t go away after two weeks, she goes to the doctor again. She is referred for mammography (a picture of the mammary gland, ed.). “To be sure, an ultrasound was also done.” The results were good and she was sent home. “I was relieved, but my gut feeling told me this was not right.

A devastating phone call

“When the lump wasn’t gone after a month, I asked my GP for a second opinion. The surgeon knew straight away that it wasn’t right. I had breast cancer, but I didn’t know how bad it was it at the time.”

Until she found out. The devastating phone call in which she was told she was incurable. “I looked at my children and all I could think was: I can’t collapse now, not in front of my children. I called my boyfriend and my family, who luckily were with me quickly. My father took my children to the playground. , which gave me a place to break down.

Tumors were found not only in the chest, but also on the pelvis and spine. “I went from nothing, to ‘just come back in six months’, to ‘you can’t be cured anymore’.”

Debby did not receive a prognosis. “It could be weeks, maybe months or even years. It could be good for a long time.” She is now receiving hormone therapy as it is a hormone sensitive cancer. As a result, she goes into artificial menopause, which inhibits the production of estrogen. Hopefully this will stop the cancer cells from growing any further. “I thought I was going to have chemo, radiation and a year of hell. But now it’s time my best friend, I won’t be cured, it’s about quality life.”

3000 women die

Just like Debby, more than 18,000 women in the Netherlands are diagnosed with breast cancer every year. That’s one out of seven women in the Netherlands. About 3,000 of them die from the effects of the disease. Breast cancer is more common in women over 50 years of age.

So research is still desperately needed, says Debby. For them, it still gives hope for the development of medicine. “Every day I live there is a chance that a drug will be developed that will give me a new chance in life.”

She happened to see that a walk will be held during the Dam tot Dam weekend in Amsterdam where the Pink Ribbon foundation will be raising money for the Dutch Breast Cancer Society. More than a thousand people will take action for Pink Ribbon this Saturday and participate.

Transforming powerlessness into strength

According to Linda Sumner, spokesperson for Pink Ribbon, the event gives strength and support to breast cancer patients. “We see that, through participation, partners can turn powerlessness into strength.

Debby is running 20 kilometers today, together with 25 family and friends. She made up for her involvement action page on the Pink Ribbon site and raised more than 7,000 euros in a short time. Her goal is 10,000 euros. Family members and friends have already raised 18,000 euros together.

Sumner says the money will be spent mostly on research. “Pink Ribbon also does everything it can to make life after breast cancer as enjoyable as possible. “

For Debby van Rijn that means spending as much time as possible with her children. “I always wanted my children to remain small, but my only wish now is to see my children grow up. My biggest fear is that my children won’t remember me anymore. I try to see and capture everything for them. I really hope they get more than that.

Not much remains of the careful life she lived more than six months ago. But Debby enjoys every day more than ever. “I feel very strong and mentally healthy. I train like crazy for the walk and I feel good about it. You can live in fear, but that doesn’t more fun for you. Seize the day and make memories.”