Caught Between a Rock and a Hard Place: Dealing with a Gambling Aunt
A woman is grappling with a difficult situation involving her gambling-addicted aunt. The aunt, who lives four hours away in another state, frequently contacts her niece, requesting to stay at her home. This desire to stay stems from the aunt being banned from gambling in her own state and seeking a new haven for her habit.
“A year ago, she called me to help her get excluded from gambling in the state where she lives because she was out of control,” the niece confided. “She can no longer gamble where she lives, cannot afford a hotel to go to towns with a casino and sees me as her gambling getaway.”
The niece has tried to politely decline the aunt’s requests, citing limited space in her home due to a roommate and expressing concern about the health implications of exposure to someone who spends long hours gambling.
"I have explained that I have a roommate, and my place is small. I have no interest in someone who spends hours at a craps table coming into my home (I’m health conscious), and I flat out cannot accommodate her as a guest," she explained. "She won’t give up!"
With the aunt’s persistent requests, the niece feels conflicted about her options. "Is my only option to end communication with her?" she asks.
The advice she recently received suggested a pragmatic approach.
“Screening her calls is one option,” the advice read. “The other is to keep repeating your mantra that you cannot accommodate her because you have a roommate and your place is too small. Then encourage her to find another hobby. If you do, she may stop asking you and look for another enabler.”
