Noah has just started studying computer science at the ZHAW in Winterthur. “I am very interested in this huge area and offers me future prospects,” he explains his groundbreaking decision. If he delves into programming, he finds himself in another world, researching, tinkering, installing. «I recently rebooted my brother’s PC. “I was able to really exert myself again,” he says, immediately feeling like he was back in his element.
From village life to the urban world
Noah grew up with his younger brother and his parents in a community in the canton of Schaffhausen. Village life is rather conservative, which he discovered early on, especially in school lessons or everyday surroundings. “But it was also nice to grow up in a rural environment. It’s much more familiar, you know each other, you’re basically with each other.” After primary and secondary school, Noah attended the FMS at the Schaffhausen Cantonal School and graduated successfully. The difference from village life was not as striking as expected. “You can feel the urban, urban life, but you can also enjoy the family atmosphere in Schaffhausen itself.” Now that he is studying in Winterthur, the anonymity is greater. “But you can quickly find your circles there too,” laughs Noah. Loose thoughts of moving out are already circling around in the student’s head. “At some point, maybe in two or three years, I want to take this step. Winterthur is an option, I like St. Gallen, with a bit of luck in finding an apartment in the Zurich area or Schaffhausen – that decision is still open,” Noah wants to take his time.
“I wanted to be unique”
Noah is considered rather inconspicuous, likes to stay in the background and is the stereotypical brave. “You don’t have to be on a pedestal all the time,” he says. If you discover him and gain his trust, you will be greeted by a bright, interested and open-minded cheerful nature. A kind-hearted soul, just like all mothers-in-law want, as the traditional cliche jargon says. Basically a normal boy next door.
“Somehow I never wanted to be ‘normal’,” he begins his coming out story, mentioning that a lot of things turned out differently than we know from other stories. «I realized early on that I liked associating myself with other people, but I couldn’t define it. It was only through a computer game that I first came into contact with the term ‘queer’ when I was around twelve years old.” A new world opened up for Noah, because he got to know a whole variety of orientations, through which he finally began to discover his own identification. «I started to think about it because I had no comparison before. I found this insight so exciting that I was really happy about it,” beams Noah. “The problem I had was that I’m actually a really boring person who has nothing that makes him unique.” The fact that Noah can now identify as queer fills him with pride and happiness. “I knew I wasn’t heterosexual, there were still a lot of question marks about everything else.” What is remarkable is that he did not struggle with his own acceptance like many others. “I owe that to the fact that I wanted to be unique,” smiles the 21-year-old.
Informed via YouTube
Because the new generation is finding its outlet through the Internet, the inner conflict has become smaller for some, but for Noah it was non-existent. “I’m still part of the YouTube generation,” he laughs, “and I got information there. But I also really enjoy reading stories and biographies about other people. That helped me move forward.” Nevertheless, as someone interested in computer science, Noah is not that present virtually. This is due to a “muddled security aspect,” he says. Noah doesn’t like to reveal much about himself and, above all, he is not prepared to have virtual discussions about his feelings. However, he likes to discuss larger topics, such as which label people identify with. And do people need a label? “No,” Noah replies firmly. “In any case, I couldn’t definitely label myself within the realm of ‘queerness’.”
And at home in the real world? «It was only later that I found out that my brother and father already suspected it when I came out. It was totally fine for her. My mother, on the other hand, thought it was less cool.” Noah was confronted with statements like: ‘This is definitely a phase, you don’t know it’, ‘You’ve never tried anything else’ or ‘You’re ruining your future’, which he didn’t think was cool. “I can sort it out for myself and decide what’s best for me.” Personal queer issues therefore tend to be discussed less at the family table. “When we voted for ‘marriage for all’, the whole family looked into it and we voted unanimously for it, even though unfortunately I wasn’t allowed to vote at the time,” Noah remembers a nice anecdote.
Rainbow colored laptop sticks
It’s not at all like Noah isn’t having a good time at home. On the contrary: “We are a very modern family and support each other. There is definitely a nice family harmony.” Noah also experiences harmony when singing. He sings in a classical choir, plays the piano and occasionally enjoys a game of golf.
In the village itself he only had contact with one like-minded person. They later met again at the cantonal school and even went on vacation together with a clique. That’s where this person found out about Noah’s queer label. His environment grew, as did his circle of friends. “I smile every time I discover students and lecturers who have a queer stick stuck in their laptop,” he says, repeatedly catching like-minded people using the rainbow-colored cover. At some point he also discovered that communities offered regular meetings. “I learned about the ‘QueerOfficers’ through the military and realized that I had never even looked for the most common things. That’s how I later realized that there is queerdom in Schaffhausen.” The community is big enough to find a place in it and to acknowledge it. “I feel very comfortable with it.”
New phase of life
Noah has recently been in steady hands. The first love? “The second one,” he replies, eyes sparkling again. The first was a long-distance relationship that was dissolved after six months due to the distance. “I was a happy person before, now I’m a very happy person,” he languishes. Common interests, optimal complementarities and the most important thing, as Noah emphasizes, mutual trust, is what makes the relationship. His new phase of life with studies in Winterthur and a new relationship required many changes, but he is enjoying this situation to the fullest.
