“Fears, depression, addictions or total exhaustion: millions of people suffer from psychological stress,” says psychologist and author Rolf Schmiel (“Toxic Jobs”). Similar to physical illnesses, you can prevent them yourself and reduce the risk.
One risk is the so-called “mental overload”: when there is constantly too much going on in your head and soul and it becomes so stressful that you feel ill.
When boredom sets in, relaxation begins
So be careful. A lot can be prevented, says the expert. The first trick is the hardest and easiest at the same time: “Learn to take a proper break again!” advises Schmiel. Just as the Italians describe it as “dolce far niente”, sweet idleness. Whereby “nothing” really means “nothing”: namely, above all, exposing “the firing of the nervous system” to external stimuli.
The old therapy wisdom applies: When boredom sets in, relaxation begins. And we often have to be able to tolerate boredom first.
So above all: put your smartphone away, advises Schmiel, and don’t look for external stimuli. Very important: Don’t spend this time brooding, but instead try to “wind down”. This is a process where it helps to keep the brain busy quite easily.
This can be done, for example, by sitting on a park bench and concentrating on it in a kind of mindfulness exercise: what does the tree look like, what are the leaves and bark like? The advantage: “When we engage in easy cognitive tasks, our consciousness does not have the chance to fuel us with self-blame, criticism and unfinished tasks.”
Self-protection before things tip over
Because our head behaves like a muscle that is constantly under tension and then reacts with a cramp or a tear at some point: it shuts down. Mental illnesses are often a form of self-protection. “So that we don’t go completely crazy, we become inhibited, sad, and no longer resilient,” says Schmiel. So to speak, as a conscious stopping of processes before it completely collapses at some point.
Stress can be a sign that danger exists. When we get stressed, Schmiel advises: “Don’t solve the problem, but focus on the moment.” In other words: “If you’re in a hurry, go slowly.” The biggest mistake is to think that you have to react immediately when the bill comes from the tax office or the call from the boss. “Most people make the mistake and run from task to task, make new mistakes and end up in a downward spiral.”
However, it is better to calm yourself down first – perhaps with a tapping technique, loud singing or cold water over your hands. “The best remedy for mental illness is a conscious decision to practice self-care,” says Schmiel. And you should implement it, even if not everyone thinks it’s good.
Everybody?s Darling ist everybody?s Depp
In order to be psychologically prepared, it also helps to learn not to please everyone: “Everybody’s darling is everybody’s idiot,” says Schmiel. It is better to set boundaries, be kind to yourself and recharge your own battery. For example, by going for a walk, doing sports in the fresh air, going to the sauna or getting an Ayurvedic massage. In short: Do more of what makes you happy.
How often? “At least half an hour a day,” says Schmiel. “If you don’t have time for that, you should try an hour.” Because if you can’t manage to just be there for yourself, “then you have a terrible problem, then it’s high time you take your own needs seriously.”
His tip: Learn from young people who value a healthy balance between work and private life in their lives. Generation Z, for example, is often criticized for this, but they do it exactly right. Because those who practice self-care are more resilient in the long term.
Sometimes professional help required
By the way: If you find that taking good care of yourself or taking a real vacation for two weeks away from home is not enough to relax and regain your strength, the psychologist urgently appeals to you to seek professional help seek:
“Then you are on the verge of burnout,” he warns. There could also be signs that there are serious stressors such as a genetic predisposition or early childhood trauma. “Then you need therapy and sometimes medication.”
