More than half of Berliners live alone. They can now look forward to an extra shocking Christmas. If they do not disappear then – almost in the loose air.
The comments expresses the writer’s opinions.
Old age and loneliness go hand in hand – and only half of the single people in the German capital have a dog to comfort themselves. That Christmas is a holiday that many dread is certainly not a particularly Berlin phenomenon. But now it seems to be really shocking for a lot of people.
The pandemic restrictions mean that all charitable dinner projects on Christmas Eve have long since been canceled. On Tuesday, many probably gave a sigh of relief, when it was announced from above that it will be allowed to gather ten vaccinated people around a dinner table. I think – and hope – that there will be a lot of such neighbor dinners on this year’s Christmas Eve. For other options do not exist.
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Railway Cathedral
That is – it is possible to join the draw for a huge Christmas event that will take place at the main train station – Hauptbahnhof. In the hall itself, there is so much floor space – and so high under the ceiling – that it is possible to let in a couple of thousand of the most party-hungry for some ompapa hymns and a take-away meal. The initiators promise to transform the station into a cathedral, as it stands. I wonder.
In fact, Olaf Scholz’s new government would wait until after Christmas Eve with the most violent measures. But yesterday, the Robert Koch Institute – the Germans’ answer to the National Institute of Public Health – sounded a warning that things were getting completely out of control – and recommended immediate action in a hurry.
Those who disappear
The drastic measures will come – but not until 28 December. New Year’s Eve this year will be marked by a ban on parties and fireworks. And now the politicians are rattling the chains. “Not a wave is coming towards us – THIS is a whole wall,” as one of them puts it. So this smells of lockdown and difficult times.
At the same time as closure and isolation, last year’s most pressing problem reappears in full.
For the past two years, I have – and many with me – experienced that people just disappear.
There may be a rumor that someone had seen an ambulance in front of the property. Or even a story about neighbors being involved in ordering medical care for the dramatically ill. But – afterwards – calling the hospital to ask how it is, is completely impossible for anyone other than spouses or close relatives. In many cases, these do not exist – and then in reality no one has legal access to information – unless the patient himself has made sure in advance to equip outsiders with a legally valid power of attorney.
The hospitals cannot even confirm or deny that the person in question has been admitted at all.
Neighbor
Many of us had tried to keep an eye on her on the fourth floor who was starting to miss out on both memory and cleanliness. When the ambulance rolled away, because a neighbor had found her with a broken femur – yes, that was the last thing we saw of the eighty-year-old woman. I myself had known her for at least 20 years, some of the other neighbors in their 40s. A lovable and helpful being, who took care of himself and never gave his surroundings any reason to talk behind his back.
Over the years, I used to drag her cat litter up the stairs – because she herself spent at least an hour on the trip. As a rule, I spotted her halfway through – and used to yell and slam about insane women who can not only ring my doorbell – but even start carrying the heavy bags. She loved it – and giggled coquettishly.
One day she was picked up by the ambulance.
The secret
Since it was almost impossible to get any information at the hospital, we had nothing to do but wait for the authorities. That is – when a lonely person passes away, after two or three months a bailiff appears to clean up the belongings. And HE can tell when the death took place. We just had to assume that our neighbor had gotten the same cheap funeral as so many others. First, the dead body is sent across the border to the Czech Republic, where the poor from Germany are cremated at extra lucrative prices. Afterwards, the urn is transported back to Berlin, where it is placed among all the other nameless graves without stones or signs.
In the neighborhood we even have our own “priest” for such occasions, and I have no idea how many cheap funerals I have experienced over the years. Music from a cassette player brought along and well-chosen words from the hobby priest, before the entourage of neighbors and acquaintances follow the urn to the anonymous part of the cemetery. But not even such a ceremony becomes possible with today’s icy secrecy from the bureaucracy.
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“Thank you – you too”
She, too, who used to stand at the crossroads and wait for me, has disappeared. She was in her mid – seventies, tiny in stature and had a knitting dog in XXS. “Good morning,” she tweeted. “And a really good morning to you,” I replied. “Have a nice day. And a good weekend, when we get this far ». “Thank you – you too.”
When we had completed our little ceremony, she smiled happily, took the pet under her arm and set course for the old people’s home. Sometimes I arrived an hour later than usual. She was there anyway. So I could not help but suspect her of having stood there all the time waiting – just to exchange these remarks with me. There were probably several similar conversation partners in her life, but we were probably not many – and not much was ever said.
One of the other regulars at the cafeteria had heard that she had pneumonia. He probably meant the crown.
The law enforcement
It was not so good with her either, who sat at the table next to mine every morning. The well-adult woman never spoke to anyone, but had a pair of bright, living eyes that followed with interest the many small scenes that take place in such a place. If the Norwegian were to end up in an argument with the Turkish waitress, she laughed out loud – but without saying a word.
One day she was also gone.
I was persuaded to walk down the block and knock on the door. Afterwards, the police were called and a nice officer broke all the rules, when she confided in me that the case had been investigated – and that the woman was in hospital – where she was fine under the circumstances.
Two weeks later, the woman appeared furiously in the cafe and scolded the hostess for having polished her law enforcement. What would her neighbors not believe, now that the police had been there several times and asked for her? Afterwards, she stayed away for almost a year.
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But the other day she was sitting there again, smiling like a sun. It was probably the sound of Christmas celebration – and loneliness – that had made her forgive us. Nice that, as a slightly cynical waitress put it: But if she disappears again, there is no question of someone from here going away to call – “just so you know”.
Without a Christmas tree
The newspaper says that Berlin has lots of organizations with people who want to help shed light on the Christmas loneliness. In total, there will be talk of 1300 people – but this year they have been told to stay home on the big night.
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I suspect it may be crowded here on Friday night, because the first three have already called to ask if we have plans for the evening – another way to invite themselves. I heard the countess warn one of “her” elders that we in this house have neither pork nor Christmas tree. But it was certainly not that dangerous. And my husband usually reads the Christmas gospel IN NORWEGIAN, she continued. Nor did IT help.
Now I’m just waiting for “mine” to sign up. It’s probably going to be a bad cabin here, I’m afraid. And it will probably be a good story of it – afterwards.
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