The cloth handkerchief has been removed from the index basket, and that is saying something. We don’t do it anymore, the thing is no longer sold. It harms human health, and it is bad for human image, especially in these times of collective fear of contamination. All that voyaged of mucus, viruses and bacteria between nose, mouth, hand and pocket, yuck. In a somewhat outrageous chat about body sounds and smells, I once asked a hostess in Thailand if there were any Western customs that they found dirty in Thailand. She shouldn’t think. Our handkerchief. ‘Cloth handkerchiefs are like wooden clogs. Something from our past, from our folklore, something for Bokrijk ‘, we read The newspapaer this weekend. It was Marc Van Ranst who said it, but bon. In Bokrijk they are at least allowed to rub their hands – even if those hands did not hold a cloth handkerchief. They can even open a whole new wing, completely devoted to snot vodeling. Coming generations can then marvel with horror at what was once the most normal thing in the world: a person who collected his body mucus, which may or may not cause sickening, in a piece of cloth, and then reuse that same piece of cloth. In their multimedia room, they can even project a thriller with videos of children playing handkerchief-laying, and state on the accompanying sign that the content of the piece of textile changed hands so unexpectedly, ‘without people even thinking about it’. Or scenes of courtly romance on a park bench, using the handkerchief of one to dry the tears of the other. Or they can demonstrate how on a balmy summer’s day the crumpled handkerchief became a headscarf with a few buttons. For the really strong souls, it may even be shown how a used handkerchief was sometimes used to pat dry a scraped knee. But there should also be something to offset all that screeching: the mountain of waste paper handkerchiefs that a person produces every year, for example. Because a cloth handkerchief, then on the plate, was sustainability avant la lettre. But above all: the museum shop should have perfume bottles with the scent of freshly ironed cloth handkerchiefs. Because, if you ask me, that is heritage that must never be lost.
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