A Mother’s Heartache: Meeting with Zacarias Moussaoui’s Mother, Sentenced to Life Imprisonment

Aïcha El Wafi holds the photo of Zacarias as a child close to her. This son became, for the rest of the world, a terrorist of September 11, sentenced to life in 2006.

Zacarias is the youngest. He was 3 years old, in 1971, when Aïcha’s nightmare life ended. An existence on the verge of the unspeakable. Forced marriage at age 12 in Morocco. A daily life of misery. And six children. A first little girl was born when Aïcha was not yet 13 years old. “We had nothing to eat. My daughter died at 7 months. I weighed 38 kg. I was hospitalized. And then I came out and “he” got me pregnant again. It was a little boy. He only survived 7 days.” Aïcha El Wafi cries while recounting these tragedies to which are added memories of savage domestic violence. It is in this chaotic daily life, with this mother who struggles against this father who hits hard, that Zacarias Moussaoui grows up.

“It is France and its good souls” who save her from this abominable life after her husband tried to throw her from the 12th floor of their HLM, in Mulhouse, and opened the skull of one of his daughters. She was then 19 years old, no job and four children. “Zacarias was always behind me at that time. He was a nice boy.”

A battered mother

She finally found a job at France Télécom – she stayed there for 30 years – and was transferred in 1979 to Narbonne where she still lives. At home, this battered mother builds a home as best she can. “I had set rules. Everyone had a task to do. My children were serious and intelligent.” Zacarias is a good student. He has a girlfriend. But he will experience “two rejections”, as she calls them. Despite his good academic results, he is directed towards a professional sector. And the father of his girlfriend tells him that he will never be part of his family .

He then decided to go to England to pursue studies after his BTS. “He ended up with a doctorate there,” she says. He then went to the United States where “he took flying lessons,” she says today. At this time, she is not in contact with him. She doesn’t know that he has become a religious fundamentalist, that he has pledged allegiance to Al Qaeda, has spent more time in Afghanistan, probably even met Bin Laden and above all that he has joined a terrorist commando… “Some time before September 11, DST agents came to ask me if I had news of him. I told them no.” This silence did not surprise him at the time, “Zacarias is not a talker”.

Mom, there’s Zacarias on TV, they say he’s a terrorist!

Then on September 11, like the whole world, she saw with “horror” the two towers fall. “Two days later, one of my daughters called me and said: “There’s Zacarias on TV, they say he’s a terrorist!” When I saw the photo of my son, I I had difficulty recognizing it. I kept repeating to myself, “this is not possible.” Moussaoui was arrested a few weeks earlier for a visa problem and then arrested by the FBI on September 10. He is facing six counts of actively participating in the preparation of the attacks.

The tragedy left nearly 3,000 dead. The whole world is in shock. He is the 20th man in this horror commando. The only culprit, flesh and blood, alive, whom everyone accuses. Like that day of the attacks when, as will be reported at the trial, he said: “allah akbar” upon discovering the planes which pierced the towers.

Condemned alone

A few weeks later, she left for the United States to try to see her son. In vain. Then manages to return there to follow the trial, in despair. Moussaoui constantly provokes and overwhelms himself by telling the judges: “if I went out now, I would take a plane and I would go blow up the White House.” Hearing this, Aïcha El Wafi lost consciousness in the middle of the courtroom. Moussaoui dismisses his lawyers, defends himself, pleads guilty and “condemns himself”, as she says. Before his defense took over the case and spared him the death penalty. “My son participated in what? He was locked up on September 11. He was condemned for words, not for actions.”

Until 2006, she sometimes saw him behind the glass of a visiting room. Hands and feet chained. They have “small talk” through a telephone receiver. “We were listened to. We couldn’t say anything to each other.” Since then, she has not returned there. “I put all my savings into it, I have nothing left.” So they write to each other. The mail arrives in the mailbox of his small house in Narbonne every three or four months. “A lady from the consulate saw him and told me he was fine. But I don’t believe her. How do you expect things to be okay when you live in a 6 m cell² without window. I miss him… I haven’t slept for 22 years. This story destroyed my family.” Aïcha El Wafi would like to sell her house in order to hire a lawyer who would allow her to visit Zacarias. This son who condemned her to life with sorrow.