The *Teh Peng* Incident

The woman, who chose to remain anonymous, recounted her experience on the online forum, detailing how a seemingly normal date took an unexpected turn. After connecting with the man, described as being in his early 30s, they decided to meet for a *mala* meal at a local food court. *Mala*, a popular Chinese dish, is known for its spicy and numbing flavor.

On the day of the date, we ordered to share, and I paid for it, she wrote. During the meal, the man offered to get drinks. She casually asked him to buy her a *teh peng*, a common and inexpensive beverage in Singapore.

According to the woman, the date progressed smoothly until its conclusion. After dinner, he said he’d like to meet again and reminded me to pay him back for the teh peng. I was like, what?? A grown ass man can’t afford teh peng???, she stated.

Tit-for-Tat?

The request prompted the woman to reconsider splitting the cost of the *mala*, which she had initially paid for in full.Responding to what she perceived as pettiness, she suggested he deduct the cost of the *teh peng* from the *mala* bill and send her his share. This proposition was not well-received.

Dude flipped out, said I’m calculative, and accused me of only doing it because I didn’t want to pay for the teh peng. I didn’t want to continue the conversation,so I told him not to contact me again. Of course, he hasn’t transferred his portion, she explained.

The woman then turned to Reddit, asking, Is this all a fever dream??? Is my market value less than a teh peng??? Is it time I give up dating???

Social Media Reacts

The woman’s post quickly gained traction, amassing over 600 upvotes within hours. Commenters largely criticized the man’s behaviour, with many expressing disbelief at his request for reimbursement. Some users joked that the woman had dodged a bullet, avoiding a potentially financially burdensome relationship.

One commenter highlighted the perceived double standard: I actually don’t understand why he wouldn’t pay for the mala? I also don’t understand why he can ask you for payment for the teh peng, but you cannot ask him for payment for the mala.

Another user offered a humorous consolation: Gurlll what a red-flagged cheapo! To cleanse your soured palate from this experience, you may redeem an exquisite Cai Png experience (10 meat + veg of your choosing) on the house from yours truly. With best warm regards, TimTamDrake, not a cheapo 30-year-old. *Cai Png* is a popular and affordable hawker dish in Singapore, consisting of rice with a variety of dishes.

A Matter of finances?

while most commenters condemned the man’s actions, a few suggested that financial difficulties might have motivated his behavior.

One user commented,Lots of people are struggling now even (at) age 30+; he’s probably not working and facing problems. He will find one teh peng very expensive. The issues are deeper.

Another added, Maybe, he’s still looking for a job after going through 27 skills-upgrading courses and maxing out his SkillsFuture credits? every teh-peng savings matters. SkillsFuture is a national movement in Singapore to provide individuals with the opportunities to develop their fullest potential throughout their lives.

Dating App Scams and Financial Caution

The incident serves as a reminder of the importance of caution in online interactions, especially those involving financial transactions. In a separate incident, Singaporean actor Laurence Pang, 78, lost S$35,000 in an online dating scam after meeting a woman on a dating site [[1]], [[3]]. Pang’s experience highlights the potential risks associated with online relationships and the need for vigilance.

Singapore Police have also issued advisories regarding scams involving malicious dating applications. Since July 2023, at least 19 victims have fallen prey to such scams, with total losses amounting to at least $13,000. These scams often involve victims receiving messages from individuals on platforms like TikTok, MI Chat, or Tagged.

First Date Etiquette in Singapore: Who Pays?

The *teh peng* incident also raises broader questions about dating etiquette in Singapore, especially concerning who pays on a first date. A recent article on Singapore’s dating culture notes, Traditional viewpoints are still alive and well in Singapore, with 40% of Singaporeans still believing that the man should pay for the date [[2]].Though, modern dating norms are evolving, with increasing acceptance of splitting the bill or alternating who pays.