Sold
Before I could fully process this information, another blow came. According to Brian, the decision to part with the baby is made early. “The parents don’t keep the baby for a long period of time. They don’t get emotionally invested and only months later figure out, ‘Okay, now we’re going to abandon her.’ So if all the babies found are newborns, that is an indication of human trafficking. Because the deal has already been made before the baby is born.” said the researcher.
It cannot be said with one hundred percent certainty, but it seems that I was already sold before my mother even gave birth. When I realized this I was overwhelmed with sadness, fear, anger and loneliness. “So she wanted to get rid of me as quickly as possible? Did I mean so little to her?” I thought. When I think back to this moment, it feels like all my organs are contracting inside and disappearing into a black vortex.
The difficult thing is that I’m not sure what happened and I also don’t know the motive of my (Chinese) parents. Should I be angry or sad at them because I was given up by them? I feel like I have to think through all possible scenarios and then process them in order to experience peace.
2023-11-24 11:05:39
#Kim #adoption #process #sold #mother #gave #birth
