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Discovering that your husband engages in cross-dressing can be a shock, but it doesn’t have to spell the end of your relationship. Instead, it can be an opportunity for both of you to explore your sexuality and desire in a different way and get even closer as a couple. However, the way you approach the topic with your husband is crucial to the outcome. Asking with resentment and disgust will likely make him defensive, while asking with genuine interest and care may prompt him to disclose and explain his behavior.
Cross-dressing has a long history and there are supportive communities that can offer understanding and guidance to both you and your husband. Many couples find that they can accommodate cross-dressing in their relationship as long as both partners are open and honest about it and agree on boundaries that respect the needs of the family, especially if there are teenage children who need to be informed in a delicate way.
If you feel overwhelmed or confused by this revelation, couples counseling can help you untangle your feelings and find new ways of connecting with each other. After years of secrecy and distance, being honest and understanding with each other can be a liberating and rewarding experience, even if it leads to separation. Best of all, you will have given your relationship every chance of surviving and thriving. For more information and resources on cross-dressing, you can visit Sí, a support group in Ireland, or seek help from a qualified therapist.
